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RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...?


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RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 5:10:21 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline 		yes, Ma'am. i'm shutting up now.

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RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 5:26:42 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 1767
Joined: 11/17/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

yes, Ma'am. i'm shutting up now.




And quit calling me Ma'am

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"I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful, beautiful life"
Daryl Worley

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RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 5:28:30 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline 		sorry

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 5:31:46 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 1767
Joined: 11/17/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

sorry


LMAO Michael, you are precious, you know that dont you?

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"I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful, beautiful life"
Daryl Worley

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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 5:37:34 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline 		yeah, a real rare gem...one everyone's just dying to have.

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RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 5:44:22 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 1767
Joined: 11/17/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

yeah, a real rare gem...one everyone's just dying to have.


/shakes head

sorry Michael, but you are not going to drag me into another discussion of this kind

_____________________________

"I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful, beautiful life"
Daryl Worley

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 5:49:38 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 2651
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Michael- before you start ANY new thread about yourself, you need to go and review all the OTHER threads you've started about yourself, about how hard it is, about how unloved you feel- and see what advice has been given to you already. Then, ask yourself if you've really done those things, consistently?

Only then, if you have something new to go on about, should you start a new thread.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

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RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 5:53:52 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline 		i think at this point i need to just shut up and chain myself up somewhere, only way i'll learn what it's like to submit. only problem is, with the way my memory is, i'd probably forget to have the key handy

< Message edited by michaelGA -- 3/6/2006 5:55:01 AM >

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RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 6:30:18 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 1850
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

we are all individuals here and i think, perhaps, i am more unusual than others. if i were completely without purpose, then there would be no reason to exist in the first place.

the sad thing is, nobody will ever know my submission, nor will they even care (even if they say they do). like you said before, you don't know me...nobody does. and, as long as things remain here, hidden behind a computer screen, nobody ever will.

i'm not trying to sound concieted here, but i have so much to offer, even on an occaissional level, yet...i nobody will ever know just what it is i have to offer and words will never surfice to explain these benefits.

online seems to be as far as i'll ever be allowed to go.



michael, I chose to "hide behind the computer screen" if you will-- My local group is less than desirable when seeking a lifelong partner--I chose to look around the world--and last spring I shut down My other search sites for this one--all My decisions--I used this site as a means to search, learn, and find a sense of community--I have met many and made many dear friends--this is where the boy and I found each other--We had both been on this site for over a year--

and don't say--"but you are the Domme"--Dommes get rejected too, it isn't shooting fish in a barrel--contrary to what people think--

The boy is wired for "giving" for "pleasing"--all inherent qualities in his submission---those needs don't change whether he has Me or not--and so he does for friends, family, strangers---it pleases him to please---now, he has Me--that giving to others doesn't stop because he has Me, it makes it sweeter because he can please Me and I understand his need to give--to help--so it is not all about the Dominant--no relationship exists with only one--

what I am surprised at is that you do not feel your "service" when you help your girl friend--who I believe you have shared has a disability--do you require a leatherclad stiletto heeled Dominatrix standing over you for YOU to feel the freedom and peace of service?

Frustrations can run high, but at the end of the day there is still a life to lead.


_____________________________

"I would rather 30 seconds of something wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special." Steel Magnolias

Mistress Hathor

Proud owner of subtoFemDommes--who is known as Her private label in training.

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 6:34:01 AM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 1752
Status: offline
quote:

i just feel like i'm wasting away here and my submission is incomplete. i only feel worth a damn when i am doing for others, it makes me happy and complete to be of service to someone else. alone, i am nothing, i care more for others than myself and it's getting harder and harder to maintain my worth.


You know you dont need a Domme/Dom to be able to fullfill that. Of course it wont be fullfilled the way you WANT it fullfilled.. but well.. arg.

Ever tried volunteering? Arg i do for others all the time. One of the reasons my r/l friends like me so much LOL. They know if they need something, i'm there. That and i'm crazy of course. = ) Ya know there's lots of OLD ppl that need help? Lots of old poeple who need company. i used to go to my short persons day school and spend all day helping there. Got parents? Make em dinner! Got pets.. do something to make em happy. Yeah its prolly far from what you WANT.. but there ARE fillers, ya know. Heck i've even snuck into my ma's bedroom and cleaned it for her once when she was sleeping. Heh. i got a good one. Find something you enjoy doing.. and find some one that needs it done. i spent 3 days gardening my mothers front yard.. it sorely needed it done.

i go to friend's houses.. and i clean. i babysit. Why? Cos i can. And i get some odd enjoyment out of doing things for others. Went to this college kids bachelor pad.. cleaned it so well all night long he woke up to me scrubbing stains out his carpet.

But bar friends and family......there is voluneterring. Oh thats one too. i used to go to the local animal shelter and well spend time. Talking, touching, cleaning the animals. Granted it was all undercover cos i wasnt a volunteer.. but hell. It was for the animals right.. to make THEIR life abit better.

They're are TONS of ways to "do" things for others. "Fillers" if you like. As for sexually based. Mine isnt either. i understand. They're are soup kitchens to go work at. Blanets to get others to donate to give to the cold humeless.

Tons of ways to help out. Just put your brain to it.

_____________________________

"Someone's got to love the stupid ppl, but it sure isnt going to be me"

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 6:48:02 AM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 1752
Status: offline
quote:

YOU are worthy. YOU have worth. But YOU have to SEE that. No one can make you see it. No one can rescue you from yourself. Only you can do that.

And also that the dream dominant will NEVER measure up in entirely to the one you imagined - because we are human and we have flaws and we aren't a creation of the submissives mind.


Only if everyone knew the first sentence! Worst part about life is others seem to think that others can save them and they are leaning on a wall that will not actually stand.. and they fall. i've tried that enough times in my life (i'm hard headed) to know the truth of what you speak. You are so very right, in all you said. You have to save yourself. There is NO being saved. Learn to adapt to your surroundings, find your little enjoyments and push that bike up hill. Eventually you will reach the sun and when you reach it.. they're are TONS of ppl up there. But ya gots to get there.

egads you are SO right on the measuring up! Arg!

Michael, i went 7 years searching for my "One" For a Dominant partner and granted i found a few a fillers, they had nothing to do with BDSM. i filled those years with learned (and ignoring), fillers. i felt hopeless at times and at other times i wasnt even bothered. But i DID things. i went to college, i had a short person, i voluneteered at animal shelters, hell i traveled, i had my own world that i WAS working on. Its all about getting by with what you have. Learn to enjoy and even thrive in what you got. Because its ALL you have. i have a Dominant now. Life isnt peachy and half the time i want to hit him over the head with a 2 by 4. But its what i have. And i'm out to make the best of it. Whether i'm fighting, or loving. Same goes when you DONT have one. Whether your miserable or not.. make the best of it. Make the best of being by yourself.

Egads you could even try improving yourself for that future one. Cos when they walk out the blue.. you are going to see Yourself fall short and sorely try and catch up. Personally i wish i spent those years while i was searching learning all SORTS of things. Gourmet cooking anyone? Belly dancing? Tons (and i mean TONS) of other skills i wish i had worked on improving before i met him.

Ms Diva has it right. Improve yourself.

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"Someone's got to love the stupid ppl, but it sure isnt going to be me"

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 7:17:10 AM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 1752
Status: offline 		i just want to add (again) That i think you all are awesome in the way you've responded to Michael. You guys have really sat down, contemplated, well thought out, LONG responses to him.

Gee Michael.. that should tell you something. i mean your thread could be "empty". Suppose an empty thread would justify you wouldnt it? "nobody sees my worth.. i am worthless" But uh.. its not empty. You have some really great ppl in here TRYING TO HELP. that must mean.... um... go on guess.... keep guessing............ that you're worthy! Woot Woot! Lets have a round of 3 cheers! Can you SEE what i'm saying? Empty thread = what you believe Filled thread = not what you believe.

quote:

thank you for your imput. i have heard this psycho-bable all my life, i have tried doing these things...and let's drop the "pity" crap...i am not seeking it. i am merely stating facts here.


oh me TOO. i hear pschyo babble coming out of my MOUTH even. For shame. i also hear that disbelief in psycho babble coming out of other's mouths. Cept this isnt REALLY pschyo babble. But i could psycho analyze you if you wish? Psycho or not psycho.. its about the truth of yourself. i for one choose to embrace my psychoticness and enjoy it. Heck why not? Ok, back to reality or now and not my head = ) You need to figure it out michael. The people here really cant help you. They can only show you a path to take. Many paths if you will. But they cant help you. Only you can help you. YOU HAVE TO FIGURE OUT HOW. OR are you saying i've that much more to offer then you.. as i've figured out how? So you telling me you dont have any intelligence to offer? Gee, what a poor guy you are! No intelligence! So sowwy. See now i understand why you feel so unworthy, you're just plain dumb!

Wait.. i bet you're not dumb.. are you? So stop acting like it. You said you've tried these things.. well fucking try other things.

You know the most interesting thing i HAVE heard was "if we dont get her an appt soon, she'll be an inpatient" Maybe we should make YOU an inpatient. Want to take my place? Point is, they're wrong, because i found MY ways. You must find your ways. And alot of good paths were shown to you.

quote:

Alot of people live with depression, but they CHOOSE NOT to let it rule their lives.


yes there are. Some manage better then others. Every now and then, i think its okay to throw a little pity party. Dunno why, but it sounds good. Helps to buck up. But you know, i've thrown pity parties long and hard (i like to party hard) and they get boring. Eventually, you will get bored.

so throw the pity party.. enjoy it.. and when you get bored.. come back to this thread. Lots of really awesome ppl put some good paths out. Ya know they really thought this stuff out. they didnt just whip it out their ass. You should feel special.

And as for "going back to chat rooms and o/l where you belong" or whatever you said. i suppose i could challenge you with MY thoughts on "going back to the gutter where i belong" Yuppers, thats a challenge. hmmm.. i might have to go wallow in the gutter.. enjoy it.. and remind myself that the only worth i have is as a dirty gutter slut.. Want a blow job? its only 50 bucks.... i just need to go get my fix.... <blinks> OH i'm not IN the gutter, forgive me.. stupidity dont you think? Stupidty to wallow in such a nasty unpleasant, unfullfilling, going no where place. Gee see any similiarities?

Michael, i'm NOT flaming you.. tho it may seem to be.. i'm like everyone else trying to get you to think. But i see their approach isnt working.. so i have tried a multitude of approaches here.. in this thread.. to spark your brain.

Really.. you should try some anti depressants. They got tons of em you know = ) Either that or go out and get old fashioned drunk so you can seriously feel like crap the next day.

Hope you feel better soon.. and the dark cloud surrounding you moves on.

_____________________________

"Someone's got to love the stupid ppl, but it sure isnt going to be me"

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 9:20:09 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Really.. you should try some anti depressants. They got tons of em you know = ) Either that or go out and get old fashioned drunk so you can seriously feel like crap the next day.


i've been on every one on the market, still have loads left...want some? i got all kinds here. of course, i was told never to "stockpile" meds due to the temptation...but, oh well...i got plenty...they do not work,

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 1:37:19 PM   
Submotive


Posts: 129
Joined: 9/9/2005
Status: offline 		Dearest michael - i think waiting is very difficult and i truly understand. One thing you might find helpful is hone your skills and abilities - live now as if your Dominant is already looking at what you're doing. Think about what you want to bring to a relationship. Do you like to cook, enjoy any other household skills? Mother nature loves those who are ready for the gifts to come. So by the time you meet your One, and you will, just be patient, you'll be ready.

_____________________________

Master's passion - Owned by Scotch Master

i would rather continue alone than be permitted to show only parts of myself to my Beloved.

If you're not living as you would like to today, when are you going to start?

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 1:48:03 PM   
maybemaybenot


Posts: 212
Joined: 9/22/2005
Status: offline
Michael:

Ask yourself : What am I doing to change the things in my life that aren't working for me. What actions am I taking to reach my goals ?

You say, you suffer from depression, and nothing works, so you will just live with it as is. In other words, you are unwilling to do anything to improve your potential. Depression, even Major Depression is treatable. Not with a magic pill, but with medication and aggressive therapy combined. And it isn't a quick fix, it is a willingness to commit to at least a year of weekly therapy. No disease has been cured since polio, in the 50's, but there is effective treatment for many. You need to be willing to commit to your own wellness. And more importantly, you need to be willing to participate in your wellness.

Many people in this thread have offered good ideas, but you reject each and every one. Maybe you need to spread your wings and take a itty bitty chance, and explore one or two of the ideas, and see what it brings you. You may be surprised.

I get the feeling that you believe that serving a Domme is the only thing that will complete you. Isn't that asking another person to take on a whole lot of responsibility ? And if we are truthful here, it's impossible. The satisfactiom from serving comes from within.
Don't depend on some one else for your own worth. Because in reality it would not be your worth at all, it would be the worth assigned to you, and you would still not have your own.

mbmbn


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There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn, and people we can't live without but have to let go.

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 1:55:21 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline 		maybe combining each med i have in stock would solve the problem and make me think like everyone else?

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 2:05:56 PM   
maybemaybenot


Posts: 212
Joined: 9/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

maybe combining each med i have in stock would solve the problem and make me think like everyone else?


Nooo, Michael ! I know it's sarcasm, but that is the point I was trying to make. YOU need to own this, You need to begin getting involved with YOU.

Michael, I do not mean those words harshly, I don't like to see anyone in pain, emotional or physical. I hope maybe you will re read this thread a few times, and not have a knee jerk repsonse, but think long and hard to yourself about what every one is saying. Your a good guy, it comes thru despite your bravado and negativity, sadly you don't see it in yourself. But it is there.
mbmbn


_____________________________

There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn, and people we can't live without but have to let go.

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 2:12:37 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline 		i'm refering to taking one or two of each at a time and see if that reprograms my mind to be like everyone else.

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 2:22:18 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 1931
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: maybemaybenot
I get the feeling that you believe that serving a Domme is the only thing that will complete you. Isn't that asking another person to take on a whole lot of responsibility ? And if we are truthful here, it's impossible. The satisfactiom from serving comes from within.


I think this might be his biggest problem in finding a dominant. What woman wants to take upon herself such a responsiblity, particularly when she can read here that he shows little interest in doing anything? Given that most dominant women have numbers of men competing for their attention, why would one want to take on a project of this magnitude with such a high potential for failure?

When Michael first arrived on this board, I and a number of others made suggestions both for him to improve his life and to improve his chances for finding a dominant (the latter was largely clustered on his taking a more upbeat attitude in his postings.) He's rejected every effort that has been put forward on his behalf.

_____________________________

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www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to maybemaybenot)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Playing it safe or afraid of real life...? - 3/6/2006 2:36:22 PM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 681
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren
He's rejected every effort that has been put forward on his behalf.


That about sums it up for me too John. I like Michael, think there is a nice guy in there...
but, bottom line, you can't help someone who WON'T help themself!

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

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Profile   Post #: 40
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