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Wondering... - 2/23/2004 4:25:37 PM   
lanette


Posts: 32
Joined: 1/23/2004
From: You think that because i allow you to
Status: offline 		I'm curious about something.... I moved across country for a relationship that didn't work out for many reasons, eventually the Dominant decided it wasn't what He wanted so i left, there were some hard feelings on both sides for various things. That was two and a half months ago, and He continues to email me and/or send messages every week or two. I've never answered a single email of His nor will i. My question is, how long does that normally last? How long before they stop and move on? At what point do you worry, if ever?

l.


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"Chaos, panic, and disorder --- my work here is done"
"Oh I get it... like humor... but different"
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Wondering... - 2/23/2004 4:57:24 PM   
SirDaniel


Posts: 10
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Las Vegas
Status: offline 		When does it stop? It only stops when he has decided to move on with his life. It seems that you are the only one with the strength to do it.


Sir Daniel n Sugar

_____________________________

Sir Daniel
Trainer of slaves, Master to one.
Las Vegas (Sin City), NV

quote:

Be true, honest, caring and loving,
and you will be found.
It is true, be you Master or slave.

(in reply to lanette)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Wondering... - 2/23/2004 7:01:30 PM   
EStrict


Posts: 730
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline 		Hi Lanette,

You said you never replied to a single one,, but have you read any of them? If so, is there a way he can tell you read them? That would be something that could possibly give him hope. If you aren't reading them, are you sure they are personal? Could it be about items you left behind or mail or something?

Also, you say it was not what he wanted, so you left. Did you discuss it with him first? If you feel he understood why you left, perhaps you should write him *one* time, and tell him that if he continues to contact you, you will consider it harassment and if need be will seek legal recourse to make him stop. Granted, it's hard to do much about it if he isn't threatening you and doesn't do anything about it, but it could at least make him think.

Sandy

(in reply to SirDaniel)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Wondering... - 2/23/2004 7:24:30 PM   
Estring


Posts: 1266
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		It seems as if he doesn't want to let go, but you didn't make clear if you had read any of the emails. As Sandy stated, he may be trying to inform you of some property or mail he still has of yours.
It is also possible that he is one of those men who can't let go of a relationship. Especially since you are the one who left him. It's hard to say without more information from you.

(in reply to lanette)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 12:15:19 AM   
inyouagain


Posts: 427
Joined: 1/6/2004
Status: offline 		Curious, just wondering if you had been 'sending' messages to 'him' by any other means... such as the remember me poem in your journal here? That was dated 1/31, a mere three weeks ago, and your 2/14 entry says you have found, and no longer looking.

If your 1/31 writing was to 'him' (named in end), it would seem your emotions have taken quite a full swing themselves in a mere few weeks?

I noticed you stated there were hard feelings on both sides, in addition to disapointments.

Perhaps after re-evaluating all factors you can ensure you are in no way playing 'tit for tat' and have infact gone on with your life as you indicated. But you must confess that a few weeks ago you evidently wanted 'him' to see your posted remember me poem.

Actually, your poem read very well, and even though it was not me who wronged you, I am very sorry and inclined to write and appologize until you forgive me for what I have not done... you did very good indeed!

Imagine if it impacted me so much... you may in fact be receiving messages from 'him' (truly affected, and named one) forever... if so, you can take some credit. (lol)

Sorry things never worked out and best wishes ahead, but both must move forward to put this behind you once and for all... no more 'tits' no more 'tats' from either side.

I wish you both the best and ultimately peace between you.

Inyouagain

(in reply to lanette)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 12:34:57 AM   
MsAkasha8


Posts: 23
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

You said you never replied to a single one,, but have you read any of them? If so, is there a way he can tell you read them? That would be something that could possibly give him hope


Just my 2 cents, but you can tell if someone has read their mail. If you do not want to give any encouragement, you can either delete the messages or do not open them at all. Also, if you have not done so before, I would write him one letter and only one. Stating that you do not want to be contacted in anyway, and if he continue's you will block him.
Mistress Akasha

_____________________________

"Know that how you express your domination or submission will be unlike any other human being. You will do it like you do it."
___F.R.R. Mallory

(in reply to EStrict)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 1:03:02 AM   
EStrict


Posts: 730
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline 		Actually Akasha, it depends where/how the mail was sent. AOL doens't allow you to know if internet mail was read, and I am told by people from other mediums they can't tell if I recieved much less read my mail.

Sandy

(in reply to MsAkasha8)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 1:07:54 AM   
MsAkasha8


Posts: 23
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Actually Akasha, it depends where/how the mail was sent. AOL doens't allow you to know if internet mail was read, and I am told by people from other mediums they can't tell if I recieved much less read my mail.

Sandy
[/quote]

Sandy,

If you are a bit of a hacker, nothing is impossible!!!

Mistress Akasha

_____________________________

"Know that how you express your domination or submission will be unlike any other human being. You will do it like you do it."
___F.R.R. Mallory

(in reply to EStrict)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 3:27:28 AM   
inyouagain


Posts: 427
Joined: 1/6/2004
Status: offline
quote:

If you are a bit of a hacker, nothing is impossible!!!


I am a well versed hacker, and e-mail tracing is most difficult, especially for a novice. Obtaining an audit trail for a message can lead the hacker/auditor through a miriad of different mailservers, worldwide. Audit records of each received/relayed message are offloaded after a certain time (server logs)... simply due to the magnitude of message traffic daily. The first problem is ascertaining where and when a message went, which can only be done by asking every mailserver if it handled message ID number xxxxx. If a server log identifies the message, the mouse chase (or goat rope) begins, often dead-ending at a subsequent relay server whose logs have been purged. That server's owner/operator must be queried by a written request, which is often denied for reasons of privacy, etc. Its no walk in the park, by any means!

If you were able to trace a single message through the worldwide web, all the way to it's destination... all you know is it got there. No way to know if it was ever read??

Most user e-mail program's (Outlook, Netscape mail, etc) don't store messages on the user's mailserver. As soon as the message is delivered (downloaded to their PC), it is deleted from the mailserver. Only a deliver trace is left, no idea if read or not.

AOL may be different, and store messages online only. I don't use or hack AOL, and do not know if they have any read mail reverse notification system, but if they did it would be a waste of resources and short lived at best.

A sender can request a return receipt for sent mails, which is triggered (and can be interrrupted) by the recipient's opening of said message. That only acknowledges opening, or receipt... NOT whether read or not.

Collarme's message system formerly inicated 'date read' by recipient, but about a week ago they removed the function. I thought it was useful, but can easily live without it. It was the only system of that type I've seen recently, anywhere... and was internal to collarme, as will any other similar method you may see elsewhere. There is no internet e-mail acknowledgement method other than return receipt I mentioned above.

The situation is essentially like snail mail, you can send a letter and get a return receipt for it's ultimate delivery... but you have no idea if it was ever opened and read.

Now if you were inferring you will hack into the recipients PC and check, hahaha! The best hack out there could only ascertain if the message was there and marked as read or unread.... not IF it has actually been read... OR by whom?

Woah!

This thread topic dealt with 'letting go' so to speak, and as I stated above in my earlier reply all factors must be examined... on both sides. I mentioned possible evidence of utilization of two way communications, which were quite pointed in fact.

When will the person who was last stabbed die?

Kinda like Monty Python's rugged and adamant bridge guard... some may not stop until their last vengeful and doggedly determined breath of life... and then curse you from their grave.

If it don't work... go your own ways and find the happiness you seek. Leave the bitterness and resentments behind you and don't pursue personal vendettas.

Fatal attraction is often NOT one sided... nuff said.

Onwards and Upwards...... does NOT include backwards!

Inyouagain

(in reply to MsAkasha8)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 4:54:28 AM   
MsAkasha8


Posts: 23
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		OMG, I assume I will have to be much more precise in what I say. What I meant was they would be able to tell if it was opened. Unless you have magical powers, there is no way you are going to know if someone has read their mail. Feel better now?
Mistress Akasha

_____________________________

"Know that how you express your domination or submission will be unlike any other human being. You will do it like you do it."
___F.R.R. Mallory

(in reply to inyouagain)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 6:36:26 AM   
belongtoyou


Posts: 170
Joined: 1/21/2004
Status: offline 		inyouagain,

May i email you if i need to do some hacking?

*smiles*

~rain

(in reply to MsAkasha8)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 10:25:29 AM   
ShadowHwk


Posts: 156
Joined: 1/5/2004
From: Huntsville, Alabama
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lanette

My question is, how long does that normally last? How long before they stop and move on? At what point do you worry, if ever?



lanette,

I second the advice you were given earlier, send exactly ONE email. State in no uncertain terms that you wish no contact. Do not wrap the statement in kind and/or loving words. Make it simple and plain. If the emails still continue then you should use whatever means you need to block his emails. If after the email from you, he tries to contact you via phone or in person simply tell him to stay away or your will involve the authorities. If he still persists do not hesitate to involve the authorities. It doesn't take long for these things to spiral out of control.

Terry
AKA ShadowHwk

< Message edited by ShadowHwk -- 2/24/2004 10:26:00 AM >

(in reply to lanette)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 2:47:02 PM   
MsAkasha8


Posts: 23
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		May i email you if i need to do some hacking?

*smiles*

~rain
[/quote]

Anytime darlin'....After my ex, "hacker extraordinare", anything you can hack, you can have...:)
Mistress Akasha

_____________________________

"Know that how you express your domination or submission will be unlike any other human being. You will do it like you do it."
___F.R.R. Mallory

(in reply to belongtoyou)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Wondering... - 2/24/2004 9:51:12 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 3896
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		Hi lanette. I had a similar experience with a Master who wouldn't let go. It's a long story but our relationship ended when hubby found out about it. My Master moved back to the UK but he continued to stalk me online and to phone me at home. He was extrememly jealous if I even talked to anyone else online. It took about 6 mo. before he finally moved on. Hang in there it will get better.
proudsub

(in reply to lanette)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Wondering... - 2/25/2004 12:03:53 AM   
inyouagain


Posts: 427
Joined: 1/6/2004
Status: offline 		Mistress Akasha,

I hope you did not take offense to my post, any of them in fact. I merely stated facts, as facts exist, not saying I had a bigger or better ex, or anything else for that matter.

It was cute to see that you had replied to ~rain's post to me, cutting my name from the quote... taking out the leading quote tag in the process (bad hacker!).

Also, I appreciate the humor in using the proclamation of hacker extraordinare association while offering your assistance that was asked of me.

I have no previous knowledge of you and wish you no disrespect as a hacker extraordinare or anything else you may be.

Again, I simply stated facts to avoid confusion among concerned readers... no disrespect was given you, but these cute things that have happened since, including your asking me if I feel better now does not appear to bode well.

I wish no confict with you, please understand that, and have a wonderful day.

Inyouagain

(in reply to MsAkasha8)
Profile   Post #: 15
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