whats the mark of a true dom?

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whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 2:56:10 AM

naturalbornslave

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i say its all down to the sub..if the sub gives his or herself up for total use then that makes the dom stronger and the sub weaker or am i wrong?

alot of people claim to be dom but if put to the test they dont live up to being a true dom?

another way of defining a true dom is self confidence and the will to win and dominate, not all have those but those that do often overpower those who are weak, but the weak can draw streghth from the strong and one day rise up and dominate the dom!!
anyway whats your opinion?
is power given from the weak to so called doms who then play a role to satisfy the weak, or is dominate defined by a strong personality and the ability to make people do what you say?

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 4:41:10 AM

LadyAngelika

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You might want to be posting this in Ask a Master, not Ask a Mistress.

Unless you were asking "what's the mark of a true Domme"

And if you meant to include both Dom & Domme, you might want to try the general forum.

- LA

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 9:32:05 AM

sub4hire

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quote:

say its all down to the sub..if the sub gives his or herself up for total use then that makes the dom stronger and the sub weaker or am i wrong? (end Quote

Certainly not in my opinion. Submissives are not weak, in my experiences generally they are much stronger than Dominants.

alot of people claim to be dom but if put to the test they dont live up to being a true dom?

Again, what exactly is a true Dom? Your opinion is going to vary much from my opinion. What test are we referring to?

(quote)
another way of defining a true dom is self confidence and the will to win and dominate, not all have those but those that do often overpower those who are weak, but the weak can draw streghth from the strong and one day rise up and dominate the dom!!
anyway whats your opinion? (end quote)

Having the confidence to win? What a load of crap. So, we are to assume no submissives have their shit together? What about the ones with MBA's? What about all of the submissives who run companies? Do you think a Dom would never work for them? So let's say I am 18 and my Dom works as a clerk at 7-11 he gets pushed around by his 24 year old boss all day long. Does that mean he is not a Dom and we are living a lie? Because he can effectively Dominate me?
I have inner strength I don't have to prey on the witless to get more. To be able to rise up. Yeah right. When you talk bout rising up, to me that sounds like..ok I've been abused all of this time. I can't handle it anymore..so you know what? Today I'm going to gain that strength deep inside of me and pick up that baseball bat and connect with the side of your head.
At least that is what I hear there.

(quote)
is power given from the weak to so called doms who then play a role to satisfy the weak, or is dominate defined by a strong personality and the ability to make people do what you say?

This is my opinion take it or leave it I can care less.
We are all on different levels. Different emotional levels. Different intellectual levels. Different monetary levels. Different family levels. All of these play part of our lives and make us who we are. If penis size is important to me...soooo important that size matters. I want a Dom with a huge one. Can he be as dumb as dirt? Oh yes. Could he Dominate you? Maybe, maybe not. But he sure can Dominate me because he has exactly what I want in life. We all want different things.
To me what a Dom is, is definately not your definition of a Dom.

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 12:32:19 PM

naturalbornslave

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wooah who got out the wrong side of the bed today?
i stick to my opinion that the majority of people allow themselves to be dominated and the so called doms or dommes just play along.
and yeah your right you do get the business men or women that like to be told what to do and be whipped etc..power exchange most of the time for a fee.
anyway ive obviously upset you but im entitled to my opinion.
and i hope you have a good day too
and i dont care less either what you think.

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 1:36:06 PM

sub4hire

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quote:

yeah your right you do get the business men or women that like to be told what to do and be whipped etc..power exchange most of the time for a fee.

I have never seen anyone ever charge a fee who is real time. I do understand FemDoms do, but that is more than likely because they can. Why not take advantage of a person if you can?
Doesn't make it right. Then again business is business.

Actually if you live the lifestyle you will notice there are a lot more submissives in high power positions outside of the home than there are men. I'm not saying that is the absolute here but, it does appear to be the trend.

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 2:03:17 PM

UtahGoddess

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Personally I have never understood how people can feel taller standing on the backs of people they have crushed. Dominance is not about overwhelming, crushing, or taking advantage of "weak" people. Nor is it about preying on the helpless. Dominance is about motivation. Power comes from inspiring people to serve you, not from fear or incompetance....but from respect and reverence.

Likewise I have never understood the concept of victim equates to submissive.

Ms Sandi

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 2:26:25 PM

sub4hire

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quote:

Actually if you live the lifestyle you will notice there are a lot more submissives in high power positions outside of the home than there are men. I'm not saying that is the absolute here but, it does appear to be the trend.

Before someone corrects me, I realized I misused the men word here. I meant to say Dominants.

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 3:54:23 PM

Estring

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Yes it is.

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 7:45:25 PM

Laura

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quote:

ORIGINAL: naturalbornslave
and i dont care less either what you think.

Then why did you ask? With that attitude you don't deserve answers.

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/10/2004 11:28:52 PM

Sundew02

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I have a dominant personality, the fact that another has a submissive/slave mentality does not make me "strong" and them "weak". When I meet and touch a male that fits my personality it is exciting and creates a team that is strong. I cannot be a Domme without a submissive/slave, but I ALWAYS have a dominant personality. I have said this many times before, popular view or not, the submissive has the greatest courage and is the stronger of the two. Never would I submit my well being, bound and helpless to anothers safekeeping. Neither would I say I am weak or easily frightened. So MY answer is, there is no weak link in the D/s duo. Sundew

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/11/2004 2:05:24 PM

SternMistress

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We all have a special birthmark.
Sshhhh, don't tell anyone else, it's a secret birthmark, known only to true dom/mes.

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RE: whats the mark of a true dom? - 9/18/2004 3:34:41 AM

ShadeDiva

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Yanno I hear that a lot - that the submissive is the most courageous, the strongest.

I think I am coming more and more to disagree with that.

Why?

Because I am discovering that I think it's EQUAL.

It takes courage to take a legal risk and beat someone. It takes courage and strength to stop yourself from temptation of going where someone says they can and want to but your inner voice says - they aren't ready, and to stand firm.

It takes a certain amount of strength and moral fiber to NOT be tempted to take advantage of someone when you know you can, and that the power is in your hands.

It takes courage and strength to assume the responsiblity for another humans experience at YOUR hands and your skill, whether it's just for a scene or for years.

It takes courage to play with someone new, to place your reputation into the scene and trust that as long as you do the right thing, and your best that there won't be repercussions or fallout later that YOU as the dominant will find mostly placed at YOUR feet.

That's just a few examples off the top of my head - obviously there are more.

It's a two way street from my perspective, as all things are when dealing with humans.

Sure submissives need to be courageous and strong, but so do dominants. And in their own ways I think both sides of the fence pretty much come up in equal amounts.

JMO, FWIIW.

~ShadeDiva

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