Help to get in shape for spring!

Help to get in shape for spring! (Full Version)

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Mercnbeth -> Help to get in shape for spring! (2/24/2005 11:29:17 AM)
Spring is fast approaching (and the rains may eventually stop here in SoCal) so ask yourself - Are you ready for bikini season? If not this calorie burning chart may help you establish your workout routine. It has been known for many years that sex was good exercise, but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric expenditure of different sexual activities. Now after "original and proprietary" research a team of scientists proudly presents its results: REMOVING PARTNER'S CLOTHES: With consent.................................12 Calories Without consent........................2187 Calories UNHOOKING HER BRA: With both hands.................................8 Calories With one hand...................................12 Calories With your teeth................................485 Calories PUTTING ON A CONDOM: With an erection................................... 6 Calories Without an erection........................ 3315 Calories POSITIONS: Missionary........................................ 12 Calories 69 lying down.................................... 78 Calories 69 standing up.................................8812 Calories Wheelbarrow....................................216 Calories Doggy Style......................................326 Calories Italian chandelier............................2912 Calories ORGASMS (hers): Real..................................................112 Calories Fake................................................1315 Calories POST ORGASM: Lying in bed hugging............................18 Calories Getting up immediately.........................36 Calories Explaining why you got up immediately.......816 Calories GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are: 10-19 years................................... --20 calories 20-29 years.................................... 36 Calories 30-39 years.................................... 80 Calories 40-49 years....................................124 Calories 50-59 years...................................1972 Calories 60-69 years...................................7916 Calories 70 and over.................Results are still pending DRESSING AFTERWARDS: Calmly..........................................................32 Calories In a hurry......................................................98 Calories With her father knocking at the door...........5218 Calories With your wife knocking at the door..........13,521 Calories Results may vary.....

proudsub -> RE: Help to get in shape for spring! (2/24/2005 11:57:23 AM)
How come i'm not skinny by now?[;)]

CalliopePurple -> RE: Help to get in shape for spring! (2/26/2005 4:06:53 AM)
Umm....what's "Italian chandelier"? Sorry if that's a stupid question, but I really don't know.

Mercnbeth -> RE: Help to get in shape for spring! (2/26/2005 10:12:00 AM)
quote: Umm....what's "Italian chandelier"? Calliope, It's a reference to doing 'it' - "hanging from a chandelier". I could say that the fact that it'a an Italian chandelier noted is because the BEST sex, as everyone knows, can only be accomplished with an Italian partner; but that would be self serving.

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Help to get in shape for spring! (2/26/2005 10:14:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: proudsub How come i'm not skinny by now?[;)] Hey Merc that was funny as hell.... and right up my alley as excercise goes. Proud, I guess it means you'd be a lot bigger if you weren't such a wild/kinky lady [;)][:D]... I'm looking at your posts more and trying to get used to the paddles, they are kinda cute. For a non-sadist, I sure love the handcuffs. M

MsLisa -> RE: Help to get in shape for spring! (2/26/2005 6:17:13 PM)
quote: Italian chandelier............................2912 Calories Okies...what exactly is the sexual position that is titled Italian Chandelier? Never mind....saw the answer in the next post...that will teach me not to read ahead....

Darthbetta -> RE: Help to get in shape for spring! (2/27/2005 3:47:00 PM)
http://store.yahoo.net/sexualpositions/chanposakait.html with animations too [:D]

MsLisa -> RE: Help to get in shape for spring! (3/2/2005 5:14:33 PM)
quote: http://store.yahoo.net/sexualpositions/chanposakait.html with animations too I was expecting Mickey and Minnie Mouse!

GentleLady -> RE: Help to get in shape for spring! (3/2/2005 7:40:03 PM)
Mercnbeth...that is priceless...thank you for the laughter

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