RE: What exactly

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:37:37 PM

angelic

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

It is no more incestuous than a Master and slave, Dominant and submissive. It is another element of D/s. Those in Daddy Dom situations do NOT think of their Doms as their real father, nor do the Doms think of their submissives as their actual children. The innocence/Protection between the two tend to mirror that particular dynamic of Parent/child but those who practice this form of D/s are not in any way incestuous.

If a visual helps, think of reaching to the young girl inside yourself, and feel her curled up on the lap of your Dom (i am being hypothetical here), with his strong arms around you, protecting you from the world...rocking you, caressing you, and telling you how he values you.

That is my understanding of Daddy Doms.

Note: CM is filtering the "i" word, fyi. i say that since i had to look at angelic's post a few times to see what she meant by it.

thank you for clearing that up owned and again i wasn't trying to insinuate anything more than my 'take' on it, if you will.

and yes i noticed i was censored too! (**%$**$@@@) lol

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:39:01 PM

slavejali

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i wondered what that word was that was starred angelic, now I've figured it out..im blond you know lol.

I'd like to agree...although Im not saying that in a necessarily negative sense...maybe the reason the people involved in that type of relationship cant just embrace the thought "Yeah he's my daddy to me" is precisely because of the social stigma associated with the word? They dont want to be judged harshly? (Still processing thoughts here)...but there has to be a difference in the relationship other than purely Dominant and submissive..they are introducing "words" such as "daddy"..so there has to be an association there....(processing processing)...

Like im sure there are heaps of slaves and submissives out there who at times feel like a little girl or little boy within their submission..sometimes i get a feeling of such innocence that i could associate with a child, or little girl...and i could associate with looking up to my Master as looking up to an authoritarian figure....but he is still Master..not daddy...so....(processing)

< Message edited by slavejali -- 2/25/2006 4:41:59 PM >

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:41:49 PM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: angelic

thank you for clearing that up owned and again i wasn't trying to insinuate anything more than my 'take' on it, if you will.

and yes i noticed i was censored too! (**%$**$@@@) lol

you are welcome! i am not in such a situation, but a close friend of mine is, and finds great comfort in it. BearNFirelight put it well, about this tenderness being on an emotional level, rather than a role play level.

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:43:49 PM

ownedgirlie

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slavejali i must confess i did not read all three of those articles, but i saw them so i threw them out there. i hope they didn't create more confusion.

i think the word brings about a familiar tenderness and sense of security/protection.

< Message edited by ownedgirlie -- 2/25/2006 4:44:07 PM >

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:46:22 PM

angelic

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i too am beginning to understand the concept, owned. It would be a wonderful relationship for some. Personally for me, i unfortunately am drawn to the Bad Boys (i have that syndrome pretty bad). Also, i truly would have some difficulty calling One 'Daddy'. The concept however is a kind and good one from what i am reading, here.

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:46:57 PM

slavejali

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I appreciated the links ownedgirlie, gave me something to chew on.

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:50:13 PM

slaveladyj

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I personally have a problem with anyone referring to themselves as a daddy. It sounds to much like a pediophile (sp) seeking to rid themselves of their desires with an adult. Why does anyone need to be someone's daddy? But this is just my opinion, in no way am I trying to upset those that practice this.

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:52:28 PM

angelic

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that is my way of thinking also, slavejali... and like you i do not wish to take anything away from Tthose that practice this type of life. It's a great big world and i love learning about all the different views.

(ok pedophile is ok to type??)

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:55:18 PM

slavejali

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Thankyou for taking the time to write BearNFireLight Sir.

I guess where I'm at now in my thinking is, why cant they just say " He is a daddy figure to me" rather than "Im all woman and i dont see him as my daddy"...why justify the kink?
To hell with peoples judgements.

Why is it ok to say "i enjoy getting my cunt tortured" but not ok to say " i have a parental figure as my Dominant"..why does one need no justification, yet the other does?

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 4:57:30 PM

angelic

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how would that be different slavejali, being a Daddy Dom or being a daddy figure?

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 5:06:30 PM

slavejali

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angelic:

Well from what Ive read so far (which is limited)...They call him daddy,, yet say they dont see him as one...then go on to say they are all woman etc etc...when in reality...what i feel at this time they are associating with IS a parental figure..otherwise they would have no need to say "daddy". So why not just admit it and be done with it.

So Daddy Dom at this time equates as a parental figure to me. Its the same thing, why have to justify it or separate it out?

Now if this isnt true....i really still dont understand the whole dynamic.

< Message edited by slavejali -- 2/25/2006 5:07:42 PM >

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 5:09:03 PM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

angelic:

Well from what Ive read so far (which is limited)...They call him daddy,, yet say they dont see him as one...then go on to say they are all woman etc etc...when in reality...what i feel at this time they are associating with IS a parental figure..otherwise they would have no need to say "daddy". So why not just admit it and be done with it.

So Daddy Dom at this time equates as a parental figure to me. Its the same thing, why have to justify it or separate it out?

Now if this isnt true....i really still dont understand the whole dynamic.

Maybe saying "i love you Daddy" is just easier than saying "i love you Parental Figure to me, a woman?"

~ grin

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 7:24:31 PM

yun

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveladyj

I personally have a problem with anyone referring to themselves as a daddy. It sounds to much like a pediophile (sp) seeking to rid themselves of their desires with an adult. Why does anyone need to be someone's daddy?

i think part of the problem is so many people get hung up over the term "Daddy" thinking it automatically referes to an age play scenario. of those relationships that i know personally where a Daddy Dom is involved...90% are NOT age play scenarios. It is much like BearNFirelight said..it's the emotional safety and connection. The Daddy Dom is normally not a sadist with their partner. they tend to hold a more loving, protective and reassuring relationship and structure. You can almost think of it as a mentor-type relationship in that the Daddy Dom is the protector/counsellor.

Because we get so hung up on labels it gets hard to identify exactly what someone is and societal influences start creeping back in.

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 7:52:54 PM

LthrdWolf

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One of my many play personas is Femme Daddy! How's that for genderfuck -Yum.

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 8:46:38 PM

Littlepita

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Oh, one of my favorite topics! I have a Daddy/Dom and couldn’t be happier to have found this type of relationship. I will say that at first I did find it weird to call him Daddy and didn’t think I wanted to. Even though we were already behaving and treating each other like a Daddy/little girl.

For me I didn’t have the best experience with my father or other men in my life where I received the nurturing I needed. When I first met him, I told him that I wanted his care, protection, and acceptance. My Joe wants to give that to me. He wants to love, cherish, protect, discipline and help me to grow to become the best I can be. He loves me as much for whom I am as for who I will become with his guidance.

One of the most important things is the nonjudgmental acceptance required of a Daddy. I need to know that I am loved for who I am, even though we both recognize that there are things that need to be changed, because they are harmful to me or to our relationship. My Daddy has to be objective but a supporter to me. He needs to discipline yet accept me. He has to comfort yet challenge me.

I know for me I had to go many, many years pretending to be strong and capable of taking care of myself and everyone around me. This is the first time since being an adult where I feel I can let my guard down and let my Joe take care of me. I can trust him to know what is best for me and give him the control of my life. It’s the most free I have ever felt.

I will say that since I am new to this lifestyle I don’t really know how a Daddy differs from a Dom. I just know I really like what I have found and it works for me.

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RE: What exactly - 2/25/2006 10:43:58 PM

MistressSassy66

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

angelic:

Well from what Ive read so far (which is limited)...They call him daddy,, yet say they dont see him as one...then go on to say they are all woman etc etc...when in reality...what i feel at this time they are associating with IS a parental figure..otherwise they would have no need to say "daddy". So why not just admit it and be done with it.

So Daddy Dom at this time equates as a parental figure to me. Its the same thing, why have to justify it or separate it out?

Now if this isnt true....i really still dont understand the whole dynamic.

Another site I belong too has a lot of Daddy/Mommy Doms and lil gurls/girls/bois/boys
and from what I have gotten from T/them is it is of a nuturing nature,she/he often doesnt work but stays home like the old fashioned "Betty Crocker" sort of thing.While shes/hes home, Daddy/Mommy is out working to care for her/him and make His/Her lil girl/boy happy with presents and clothes.
While not all of T/them follow this dynamic it seems the most popular.

Age Play on that site is Adult baby and Mommy.I havent seen Men adopt that role before
but I'm sure it must happen somewhere.

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RE: What exactly - 2/26/2006 8:12:14 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Link to 9 Threads on Daddy Doms

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