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RE: Financial issues


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RE: Financial issues - 2/25/2006 10:32:14 AM   
McWhips


Posts: 125
Joined: 5/9/2005
Status: offline
Theres no smoke without fire. No ones delusional enough to complain to the manager of an Apple convention that there where too many oranges unless theres Oranges there.



< Message edited by McWhips -- 2/25/2006 10:33:46 AM >

(in reply to orfunboi)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Financial issues - 2/25/2006 6:34:23 PM   
seaturtle50


Posts: 381
Joined: 12/28/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Its a wonderfull theory and I would really love to believe it.


OK! Great! That will likely do allot for your inner-peace and general well-being!

quote:

Reading between the lines on can see I am implying that not all Dommes are ideal themselves but at the end of the day one has to be honest and blunt about it as its not so much 'unfair' but 'disengenious' to statistically scrutinize only male subs but not Dommes as ultimatly we are all mortal humans and we vary, meaning that the catagory of Domme cannot be superflous.


While i had considerd this as well, in my opinion breaking this down in this way, or adding other parameters takes away your "child’s math" theory entirely. <Note: i am only capable of the "childs" version>.

Since people are "people," i had considered the personality quirks and such as equal (although the Dommes quirks are clearly "better" quirks) - So - i did not factor those considerations - and considered it a wash.

Bottom line? There is a Domme <read one special one if you like> Who is compatible to you and there is a Domme that is for me too. In my case, i need to get ready and prepare, lest i squander the opportunity when presented. My attitude is likely the first thing that will attract, or deflect Her kind notice of me.

The above statements are not deliberately exaggerated or a bias attempt for me to have an excuse just to be pessimistic and argue with you all, they are my attempt to ease your pain, even slightly.

st50


_____________________________

i want to be your ... #1 lowest common denominator.

Destiny happens in a moment ... in the blink of an eye.

(in reply to McWhips)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Financial issues - 2/26/2006 11:57:33 PM   
subtlesubie


Posts: 49
Joined: 1/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

A free ride?? You have no clue how much work financial domination is for the Dominant. They have to budget the sub's money and get the bills paid. They set forth an allowance for the sub, deal with investments, start and put money into the Christmas Clubs and savings, plan for future large expenditures (car, house) and emergencies and such. You're discussing your fantasy idea of what financial domination is, not reality. While controlling the purse strings does give you a lot of power it is also a hell of a lot of work with scary real world reprecussions for messing up.


Yeah financial dominatrices often have the best interests of their subs in mind. Just ask Princess Sierra.

(in reply to BeachMystress)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Financial issues - 2/27/2006 12:10:37 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 703
Joined: 1/12/2006
Status: offline
quote:

While male subs out number Dommes 100:1 and many of the relationships between those depend on money being given to the Domme in one form or another.

No-one can deny that fact.


Where is the scientific research to support that 'fact' because I'd like to read that research for myself.

Celeste

_____________________________

I wasn't there. I didn't do it. Nobody saw me do it. I wanna lawyer!

(in reply to McWhips)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Financial issues - 3/6/2006 9:14:23 PM   
MarinaBlack


Posts: 47
Joined: 8/6/2005
Status: offline
She might have felt you were "testing" her.

They really don't like people talking about financial domination on this site - I understand we're not allowed to include that expression in our profiles.

(in reply to strob)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Financial issues - 3/7/2006 10:41:57 AM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 1062
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

quote:

While male subs out number Dommes 100:1 and many of the relationships between those depend on money being given to the Domme in one form or another.

No-one can deny that fact.


Where is the scientific research to support that 'fact' because I'd like to read that research for myself.

Celeste


Yeah, I'm rather interested in it myself - since we've talked to many many submissives, and the closest we have come to asking them for money was a discussion of "if you move in, you will be expected to have at least a part time job to help with the bills." And you'd be amazed at how many balked at that - either because we would expect them to give up some of their money (to pay bills they helped to run up), or because they wanted to stay at home and be houseboys full time *rolls eyes*

For us, financial domination isn't our style - too much work, too much stress. Plus there is the fact that I, alone, make as much as all three of the other members of this household combined (and that's with rob having two jobs now). Why on earth would I want to control another $200/week from each of them when I don't want control of the $1,000/week or so that I make? That's Holly's job and she can have it.
But even then, she doesn't want all of their money. The corporal gives about $600/month to help with the mortgage and other bills, as well as the animals (he has adopted one of the cats as his, as well as brought in a toad, and a bunch of fish to add to our zoo; it's not like we're making him help pay for them when he doesn't have anything to do with them) - rob has always given us a little over half of what he makes, which varies depending on which job he's working and how many hours he gets at each. The closest thing to financial domination we get now that we have our two boys and we're all living together is that we insisted that the corporal get a savings account ... he had no money saved when we got together - he lived from paycheck to paycheck ... never starving on payday or anything, but still. Now, after almost 6 months (through me being unemployed for a month and him being off work for 3 weeks - both due to the same incident of him being injured by an inmate) he has about $250 saved. This may not seem like much, but that's a lot more money than he has had saved any time in the last 5 years. The money is in an account with his name on it - HE insisted that it have my name on it as well, which doesn't exactly make me happy, but this way I can go get money out for him if he doesn't have time to.

In my experience with r/l interactions with people - Dominants of both genders have expected money out of their submissives of both genders. This is NOT a strictly F/m phenomenon. I know F/f couples where the submissive is expected to turn over any and all earnings to the Dominant - same for M/f and M/m (although, in all honesty, I only know one M/m couple in r/l ... so they might be the exception?). I also know couples where the submissive actually does all the budgeting and such, because they are just better at it than the Dominant. Dominants and submissives are supposed to complement each other - if one is good at something and one isn't, it makes sense that the one who is good at it should do it, no matter which one is the Dominant.

And now that I've gotten way off track with respect to the OP - I think you need to understand that, for whatever reason, your question was misinterpreted. Tasha had a good suggestion on how to rephrase it for your next go around with a Domme, think about that for awhile. Eventually, you'll talk to someone else (or maybe her - she may see this thread and realize that you weren't being a jerk by asking) and you'll have the opportunity to bring the topic up again.

< Message edited by SweetDommes -- 3/7/2006 10:42:19 AM >

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Financial issues - 3/8/2006 1:34:10 AM   
strob


Posts: 34
Joined: 9/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: EarthGoddess52

This site has some sort of note on the Home Page about the mention of Financial Dominantion or compensation or exchange of money. I'm not sure how well Collarme screens their posts and message boards, but perhaps this is the reason She stopped communicating with you??? Perhaps you should have taken this discussion to a private email venue. Just a thought

theEarthGoddess


Discussion took place on yahoo messenger, so it has nothing to do with not been allowed to mention financial domination on collarme.
Anyway, we talked again yesterday and now she seems interested; she said that me mentioning financial domination, made her feel that I was thinking of her as a quote "whore like any other" unqote...
I can't say this makes sense to me because I didn't say "how much I have to pay for a session?"

(in reply to EarthGoddess52)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Financial issues - 3/8/2006 9:50:58 AM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 1062
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: strob
(snip) she said that me mentioning financial domination, made her feel that I was thinking of her as a quote "whore like any other" unqote...
I can't say this makes sense to me because I didn't say "how much I have to pay for a session?"


One person's emotions rarely make sense to others ....

(in reply to strob)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Financial issues - 3/8/2006 3:12:08 PM   
MarinaBlack


Posts: 47
Joined: 8/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeachMystress


quote:

ORIGINAL: imtempting
In my opinion though, the people who enjoy it just want a free ride..



A free ride?? You have no clue how much work financial domination is for the Dominant. They have to budget the sub's money and get the bills paid. They set forth an allowance for the sub, deal with investments, start and put money into the Christmas Clubs and savings, plan for future large expenditures (car, house) and emergencies and such. You're discussing your fantasy idea of what financial domination is, not reality. While controlling the purse strings does give you a lot of power it is also a hell of a lot of work with scary real world reprecussions for messing up.


Here, here Sister.
Financial Domination = Responsibility = Work
It is not a shopping spree.

(in reply to BeachMystress)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Financial issues - 3/8/2006 3:21:48 PM   
MarinaBlack


Posts: 47
Joined: 8/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: diaperedbaby

I don't know that for all it is a free ride, but it is a trust issue to me. The other issue is, does the dom have the capability to effective manage the money? Again, another trust and expeience issue. Since I am older, it would have to be someone with a proven track record and a period of time to ensure I would have that confidence in them.
Just because someone is a dom doesn't mean they can manage finances.


Absolutely, but if one trusts another to be THEIR Domme and claims to be seeking TPE or 24/7, then financial domination MUST be included in the equation. If it's to be total domination then it's TOTAL DOMINATION.

(in reply to diaperedbaby)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Financial issues - 3/9/2006 12:51:16 AM   
strob


Posts: 34
Joined: 9/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MarinaBlack
Absolutely, but if one trusts another to be THEIR Domme and claims to be seeking TPE or 24/7, then financial domination MUST be included in the equation. If it's to be total domination then it's TOTAL DOMINATION.


Just my thoughts, if it is total then is total, if just occassional play then it is fun domination.

(in reply to MarinaBlack)
Profile   Post #: 51
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