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MistressLiL -> Redneck BDSM Humor (1/16/2004 7:08:16 AM)
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I think since I do come from a long line of rednecks I wont offend any of you out there that are also ones with these following jokes LOL
YOU JUST MIGHT BE A REDNECK SUB IF.....
If you have ever gone to a play party in curlers and a kerchief, you just
might
be a redneck sub.
If you count your spankings "1...2...3...the next number...the next
number...the next number...", you just might be a redneck sub.
If your safeword is "cut it out or I'm tellin' Ma", you might just be redneck
sub.
If you know what your Mistress expects from you by the way she belches, you
just might be a redneck sub.
If your master tells you to fix him a steak, and you start by loading the
shotgun, you just might be a redneck sub.
If fulfilling your master's every whim means picking up a 12-pack and changing
the TV channels for him, you might just be a redneck sub.
If you have ever been bound and gagged in the bed of a rusty pick up truck,
you
just might be a redneck sub.
If you have ever tried to brighten the dungeon decor with a pair of pink
flamigos, you just might be a redneck sub.
If you have ever had to use your safeword in order to spit tobacco juice, you
just might be a redneck sub.
If you have ever used nipple clamps in order to remove tics from master's
huntin' dogs, you just might be a redneck sub
_________________________________________
YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK MASTER IF.........
Hmm, turn about is fair play, so here's the other side of the coin. Once
again, apologies to Jeff Foxworthy.
If the floor of your dungeon is covered with oil slicks and grease stains, you
just might be a redneck master.
If your idea of fetish gear is camouflage pants, NASCAR t-shirt, and baseball
cap, you just might be a redneck master.
If the only submissive you play with is also your wife, your sister, and your
aunt, you just might be a redneck master.
If you need to move carburetors and dead batteries to get at the St. Andrew's
cross, you just might be a redneck master.
If you keep your crops in a rack on the rear window of the cab in your pick-up
truck, you might just be a redneck master.
If your cane doubles as your CB antennae, you just might be a redneck master.
If your submissive sleeps outside in a cage and your hunting dogs share your
bed, you just might be a redneck master.
If you repair your leather with duct tape, you might just be a redneck master.
If your idea of a quality leather shop is BillyJoeBob's Beer and Bait, you
just
might be a redneck master.
If you have ever had to take the deer you were dressing in order to restrain
your slave, you just might be a redneck master.
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