|
SadistDave -> RE: Poly LIfestyle (10/26/2005 1:44:40 PM)
|
I guess the obvious thing needs to be said first. You're a male sub. Male subs are a dime a dozen, and trust me, no one is looking for the guy supplying the dimes. You belong to a sub-set of the lifestyle that has probably the worst reputation for being full of players and wanna-be's.
So here's the truth of it: you have a hard time ahead of you. Since I have no way of knowing anything about you, I'll base this on the idea that you're for real, on the level, and are rightiously pissed at all the losers before you who have made your situation so unpleasant...
-Go to meetings, not munches to begin with. Munches are for socializing and for gossip. In most cases, they are not the reason the group exists. Starting out with the munch crowd will sidetrack you. Go to the meetings to start out.
-Dress nicely, and don't show up wearing all your fetish gear.
-Be helpful. Show up early and ask if they need help setting up. Stay late and ask if they need help cleaning up.
-Be respectful to everyone you meet. Use Sir and Ma'am when in doubt, if they are also submissive, they will correct you.
-For a few meetings, do not start any conversations, but be open to any that may come up. The only exceptions to this are comments on clothing, jewelry, or gear.
-Ask questions. Don't try to impress anyone with any anecdotes you may have. You will have plenty of time later to share them.
-Under no circumstances should you ever touch someone unless they touch you first. If things are going good for you, you don't want to risk invading someones personal space. When someone touches you, it is a sign that they accept you in some small measure. Experienced people really don't give a damn if you accept them or not...
-Be mindful of little things. Insignificant things like lighting peoples cigarettes, helping the woman in 6 inch heels navigate stairs, or holding doors open for people can get you noticed in a good way.
-Learn about the people and activities in the group. Pay particular attention to people and activities that seem to come up often in in conversations as extreme positives and negatives. Gravitate towards these positive influences.
-SD-
|
|
|
|
