RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive

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RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/5/2005 3:13:28 PM

dominmd

Posts: 434
Joined: 6/27/2005
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Sometimes it is just the type of eye contact you have.

One girl I know always looks down when she talks to me. If we walk around, she is always behind me on her own. I always have to tell her to look at me, most of the time she does. You better believe I want this girl badly, but we are just friends and have agreed to that. So, it is hands off.

I think she is a submissive by people's definitions here. And I can be very dominating even in the vanilla world, many can sense this as well. My tone of voice, I always make eye contact while talking, and I put on a strong confident vibe.

And Zaynab is right, if there is a play smack, it is usually a sign of "let's go further" but I believe this can be done by either a sub or a Dom.

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Post #: 61

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/6/2005 1:28:42 AM

MadameDahlia

Posts: 1329
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: Southern California
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I don't really think there are any signs that will be universal for everyone.

If someone demanded I take a seat I don't care how much my feet hurt. I'll use that as an excuse to take my heel off and clobber them. Now if they offer a seat (on the couch or not!) I'm going to sigh with relief and get the hell off my feet. Then I'm looking for someone with skilled fingers and scented lotions...

I don't carry around floggers or riding crops. If someone can't figure out what I am they can feel free to ask. And if they don't like the answer they can also feel free to bugger off.

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

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Post #: 62

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/8/2005 8:17:55 PM

j2003

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Joined: 7/15/2004
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Finding a submissive someone is cake. The trick is finding one, or more, that is kinky. For that you just have to get to know them.

By the way, it doesn't really matter if someone's outward appearance is submissive or dominant; it only matters if they are submissive to you.

j

(in reply to MadameDahlia)

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Post #: 63

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/9/2005 4:06:11 PM

HerJewel

Posts: 23
Joined: 7/22/2005
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I read somewhere that within five minutes of someone coming into a room, you can tell if they are dominant or not. Also about the dominant/submissive thang being equated to what one would observe in a wolfpack. We humans are quite a bit more complicated than wolves, with all of our preferences and unique qualities, and I like to think of a continuum. All of us fall somewhere along it. I still think the 'eyes' have it, but just observing for a time how one responds to you will tell the tale. I am very shy, and yet can switch easily, but I am naturally submissive. My tale goes between my legs as if it has a mind of its own, my eyes go down to the floor instantly, but I have no problem letting someone know when I am neither interested in nor willing to submit to there every command.

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Post #: 64

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/10/2005 2:20:46 AM

DomButNotForgotn

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Joined: 6/2/2004
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I play spot the sub/dom at times.

Some people have typical dom or sub characteristics - sitting in the power position, how they carry themselves, etc., but I have met enough doms, subs, and switches to NOT think there is any given set of behaviors that makes it easy to spot somebody that way, and be correct all the time.

I've had 2 great subs that NOBODY on first glance (or 2nd, 3rd, etc.) would ever think was a sub.

Some very Type A women like to be dommed sexually, but they would probably not make good slaves, it's not their nature, in my opinion.

Fun question!

(in reply to darkangel)

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Post #: 65

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/14/2005 2:03:16 AM

SupahBoy

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Joined: 7/28/2004
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This is a very intriguing topic... I used to serve a particular Goddess whose profession was a prodomme. She worked at an establishment, and it was here I would report to. I pretty much stayed there until it closed functioning as her attendant. Her being My Mistress I was sincerely submissive as I could be, doing every task to the best of my ability at least. Now this being a dungeon there were several other Mistresses on staff. Often one of them may ask me to go to the store for them or whatever. Usually If I was cool with this particular Mistress it was not a problem and I was happy to run the errand. Occasionally one that I did not know would try to lay something on me. They would glance a look off me knowing they were out of luck. Now the thing is here I was not being a jerk or rude, but just because they has the audacity to assume I was a walking rug, I'd have to let them know what it was about. The point here is you cannot apply this submissive label and think I bow down to all. No no no... On an interesting note I actually made more friends there with that attitude because they said they liked that I was never once a rug for all to walk over.

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Post #: 66

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/14/2005 2:40:59 AM

zaynab

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Joined: 6/20/2005
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Superman... I've been keeping tabs on how you are doing with the collarme ratings... I have to say.... your stamina is impressing me... what was your question this time?

*checking....

I cant answer this one because I've never been a vanilla person but keep up the good work! *smile

(in reply to Superman42280)

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Post #: 67

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/18/2005 5:11:19 PM

LadyofLight

Posts: 60
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Well now,I dont carry my flogger at all times but I do keep it handy. However,I'm new to being a Domme.I spent much more time as a sub before deciding I was a swtich. I think alot of it for me was where I was at in life. However,given the right man,I could probably very easily find myself on my knees.

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Post #: 68

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/18/2005 8:00:09 PM

Sirtimothyk

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Joined: 11/26/2004
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i generally start by pulling her hair.....seeing her reaction.......move my hand on her knee......giving her a playful swat every once in a while.........but i have never talked to a vanilla about the lifestyle.....it would be interesting....
Tim

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Post #: 69

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/18/2005 10:37:00 PM

APhacetoSit

Posts: 46
Joined: 11/23/2004
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Look for someone who says "I am going to the ........., can i bring you anything?" look for the person who keeps an eye on your glass or plate, and asks if you need more of anything. It is really a simple thing, but quite a few non-submissive will not ask the questions.

(in reply to Superman42280)

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Post #: 70

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/19/2005 2:51:02 AM

IronBear

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From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
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Why not continue that line of thought and watch a girl’s reactions when you offer to get her a drink. With some its an almost automatic reaction to try to get the drinks and have you sitting and waiting for her. There is lots of little signs to be spotted in similar situations.

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Iron Bear

Master of House Iron Bear

Yes, I am a Master, but not your Master..........

The Incorrigible, irrepressible, irreverent grizzly

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Post #: 71

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/19/2005 3:09:38 AM

Ladybelladonna

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Superman42280

When you meet someone in the vanilla world -- any chance of hints that they might be a submissive?

"Ello".......... itz in my eyes....... my head instantly drops when i recogonise a Dominant... tiz a natural response for me having been 7th born into an extremely aggresive Dominant family... i am now 53 and from the age of four years old i was made to take pain to outa-limits. The constant head butting from my brothers teaching me not to cry.... so i walked with my head bowed as a child..... now when i bow my head i usually have a grin on my face too...........
da tricky belladonna

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Post #: 72

RE: Best Way To Spot A Submissive - 8/19/2005 3:28:35 AM

IronBear

Posts: 2678
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
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Talking of bowed heads, when my son was a toddler, he always greated people and especially men with his bowed, chin on chest. I used to worry about that for he is normally an out going child, however O saw his trich. As he got close enough he smartle raised his head............. Eeeeeeehaaaaaa and head butted the guy right in the family jewels. Ergop, my advise to tall males who have before them, a tiny lady with her head bowed, is to ensure you wear an armoured cod piece.

_____________________________

Be Well
Iron Bear

Master of House Iron Bear

Yes, I am a Master, but not your Master..........

The Incorrigible, irrepressible, irreverent grizzly

(in reply to Ladybelladonna)