i have been asked in the past if it was wise for a submissive or slave
to change there profile because people can't seem to read what the sub or sissy is looking for. would changing there profile make a difference

sincerely, knees2You

quote:

if a snake bites before it is charmed there is no profit
for the charmer

quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic

~shrug~ who knows. i'm really really clear in my profile that i'm looking for dialog and friends and NOT owners, dominants or play partners. all the same, i get a surprising number of people wanting just that.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShadeDiva


*chortle* I just had the same exact experience here, and I just found this forum tonight. I was *immediately* getting messages from hopefuls as I was just beginning to set up my profile, so I slapped a note that clearly stated all I'm seeking is conversation - and yet, I'm still getting a few.

I can tell folks straight out, look I am just too busy to add another person into the chaotic mix that is my life - they *say* they grok that - and then a few weeks down the road they are hinting around and trying to get me to say if I might be interested soon or someday. <shakes head>

I'm always been of the opinion if it happens, so be it ... if it doesn't ... so be it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MizSuz
Ahhhh...but do they grok in FULLNESS?!? <smile>

quote:

ORIGINAL: MizSuz
I too have had this experience. In february my mother died unexpectedly after a brief illness. Although I had been very clear on my profile prior to that point that I wasn't looking, I don't look and that I don't care to initiate relationships that way; I still got a TON of email inquiries. After my mother died I put what is now in my profile. Loss in my family, not looking (essentially it was 'leave me alone'). So now I get email that starts out "sorry to hear about your loss....I am a 35 yo sub looking for...." or there is no mentioned at all of my loss. Those that email me now with no mention of my loss and just launch into what they are looking for get BLOCKED. That way, if they want to contact me in a few weeks/months when they think my situation may have changed - they have to create a new account to do it from.

It really does function as a weeding out tool. I can't imagine wanting anyone who thinks of themself before even my grief in my life. Especially not as a 'submissive.'