What's the Best Part about being a Switch?

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What's the Best Part about being a Switch?

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All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Switch >> What's the Best Part about being a Switch?

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What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 6/22/2004 1:07:53 AM

MistressKiss

Posts: 296
Joined: 1/1/2004
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OK, our category is beginning to look like "the road less traveled"....what is the best part about being a switch in your humble opinions?

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Post #: 1

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 6/22/2004 1:39:56 AM

ShadeDiva

Posts: 999
Joined: 3/31/2004
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline

Knowing who I am and being comfortable with being who I am.

Getting to express each side - when I can overcome my self made obstacles.

Having a partner that will accept that side even when it conflicts or butts head with theirs - and even support and encourage my exploration and realization of who I am as a whole - rather than trying to constrict me to one facet of the person I am.

Knowing full well what the mean shit I think up does to the other - from their shoes.

Pissing off/disregarding those that can't accept that I don't require their acceptance nor their assertion that I have to *choose* a side of myself and only be that part to be valid or real.

Just off the top of my head.

~ShadeDiva

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Post #: 2

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 6/22/2004 11:54:52 AM

Laura

Posts: 393
Joined: 6/22/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

I think we have a much more realistic insight into control and domination. I like meeting other Switches far more than Doms or subs. When I talk about D/s Switches understand what I'm saying and what I mean.

(in reply to ShadeDiva)

Post #: 3

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 6/22/2004 3:25:46 PM

MistressKiss

Posts: 296
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Now that is interesting....about us having a more "realistic" view of the lifestyle. I think there could be some merit into having an understanding of both sides of the coin. Very interesting.....perhaps that is why I feel more practical than many I know locally. Some live with their heads in the clouds on this 24/7/365 thing (I won't go there)...and such disappointment sets in when people realize that we are still humans who makes mistakes and get tired.

More opinions, ya'll...come on!

_____________________________

"I assure you, Your Honor, I don't have to practice...I'm very good at them..."
(The Marquis de Sade at one of his trials for the sexual perversities he practiced)

(in reply to Laura)

Post #: 4

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 6/27/2004 9:18:30 AM

cellis

Posts: 25
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline

I agree that being a switch gives me insight on both sides of the flogger. I understand how hard it is to keep things fresh from a Dom/me perspective... on the other hand I know how easy it is to fall into sub space and just let things happen around me....

(in reply to MistressKiss)

Post #: 5

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 6/27/2004 9:34:11 AM

sarbonn

Posts: 193
Joined: 3/23/2004
From: Grand Rapids, MI
Status: offline

I would imagine one of the struggles of being a switch, especially on message boards and sites involving profiles, is the inability to be part of a search. I just noticed it here that if I was a switch, I would probably not be found on most searches for a dominant male, nor would I be found under searches for a submissive male. People would either have to be looking for ANY which might bring up so many connections they might not want to use that, or they'd have to search for Switch specifically, which if they're having access to Dominants or Submissives as choices, they might just avoid doing that.

I've begun to realize I may one day be a switch, personally, even though I'll admit that I have very little experience being a dominant. I think this personally makes it very hard to convince anyone I would be serious because then it would appear to be someone who is just trying to link up with anyone rather than someone exploring something because it might just be time.

Anyway, just some thoughts. I figure there's not a lot of communication on the switch boards here.

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Post #: 6

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 6/30/2004 10:02:45 PM

Laura

Posts: 393
Joined: 6/22/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

I search for Switch specifically, male sub secondly. I don't search for Dom at all.

Why would you say there isnt communication here? I think it's doing quite well.

Being a Switch is not the same as being a Dominant. If you want experience being a Switch you just have to be one. It's not like you take turns, you just are. People don't seem to get that.

(in reply to sarbonn)

Post #: 7

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 7/14/2004 8:02:34 PM

trueneutral0

Posts: 27
Joined: 7/9/2004
Status: offline

No one knows what your are thinking. "when you creep from the back i got tricks up my sleave"_Sublime

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(in reply to Laura)

Post #: 8

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 7/15/2004 12:10:38 AM

Sinergy

Posts: 1290
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Being a Switch is not the same as being a Dominant. If you want experience being a Switch you just have to be one. It's not like you take turns, you just are. People don't seem to get that.

I get it, Laura.

I have a close friend (which may develop into something more) who is a switch. It amuses me no end when the switch is in Dominant mode and I get to watch her interact with other people.

She was asked to play with a Master's slave. So she did all the stuff about tying, flogging, got out the single tail and went to work.

The Dominant/Master pulled his stuff out and moved in to co-top, and the switch did not relinquish the prime location to beat the submissive. There was a small war of wills as the Dom tried to push his way to the pole position, and he ended up backing down when the switch didnt move.

She didnt argue with him, she didnt do anything but focus on the submissive being scened, but it was really obvious between her and the Dom who won the war of wills.

It would have messed up the scene if I had laughed out loud (I was invited to watch the whole thing) so I successfully controlled myself.

And when the switch is in submissive mode she is one of the most submissive individuals it has been my distinct pleasure and honor to know.

I agree with you Laura, switches are a special breed of individual, and I have nothing but respect and admiration for them.

Sinergy

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(in reply to trueneutral0)

Post #: 9

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 7/22/2004 9:11:44 AM

muse

Posts: 24
Joined: 4/30/2004
Status: offline

i had someone tell me, in reference to being a switch "you're just greedy"

i replied "yeah, so?"

< Message edited by muse -- 7/22/2004 9:13:21 AM >

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Post #: 10

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 7/22/2004 11:22:01 PM

atmt777

Posts: 21
Joined: 5/23/2004
Status: offline

party people over here in the window

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Vs0.0 and a bag full of nuts...

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Post #: 11

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 7/24/2004 10:44:05 AM

LadyShoshin

Posts: 480
Joined: 7/19/2004
From: Burlington, Ontario
Status: offline

The best part is the opportunity to feed the need of both aspects of my personality. I am going through a transformation right now, I started as a sub, then became a sub who could top, then went through a year and half 24/7 with another switch. Right now, at this point in my life I am a blossoming Dominant who enjoys bottoming to long term, trusted friends.

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(in reply to MistressKiss)

Post #: 12

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 10/14/2004 2:04:32 PM

ChrisGreen

Posts: 103
Joined: 10/9/2004
Status: offline

Yes, I switch, it is an automatic process for me, and I tend to the sadistic when in dominant mode, so that matches the masochism nicely.

Not every submissive will put me into dominant mode, though, only a few, and they have to be people who are not normally submissive, but who find themselves being submissive with me.

In the opposite way, I am not submissive with all dominants, only some dominants can make me submissive.

I have had 24/7 switch relationships, and these have been very satisfying, in many ways more satisfying than a purely submissive or dominant roled relationship.

As to whether or not switches are more rounded, where the scene is concerned, I would have to say that we are, and that we are able to be closer to our partner in the scene because we can do both.

I believe, purely as a personal opinion, that anyone who thinks that they want to be a dominant, should spend a couple of years being trained as a slave first, before they go and do training to be a dominant.

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Post #: 13

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 10/14/2004 8:24:32 PM

Laura

Posts: 393
Joined: 6/22/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrisGreen
I believe, purely as a personal opinion, that anyone who thinks that they want to be a dominant, should spend a couple of years being trained as a slave first, before they go and do training to be a dominant.

I agree with your post. But, I don't think a Dom should be trained as a sub first. For one thing, if a person really is a sub or a Dom how can they really know what it is and how it feels to be in the opposite role. For them it will only be a role and they will never get beyond pretending or trying to understand.

I do think everyone who labels themselves should try the opposite role. I see people who decide where they fit in just cause they want to fit into the stereotype. My ex assumed he was Dom only because he didn't want to be a male submissive. In the end I don't know where he would have fit in but he wasn't very sexual. His main interest in sex seemed to be looking at pictures rather than doing anything with a real woman. No doubt that is some kind of fetish.

(in reply to ChrisGreen)

Post #: 14

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 12/27/2004 1:14:15 PM

ropeadventures

Posts: 15
Joined: 12/6/2004
From: England
Status: offline

There's nothing better than seeing a sexy girl bound and helpless... Infact the only thing that matches this is having a girl want to bind you up!!!

In a relationship I'm not looking for a "bitch" or a "carpet" but someone to share a lifetime with (I'm hoping) An equal partnership is the best type of partnership - although if she's from a very rich family ;)

As I couldn't marry someone who isnt educated, traveled (or willing to), I couldn't marry an individual who won't experiment sexually.... Have fun and try as much as is safe to... Sexually adventurous - not promiscuous...

Until I meet the girl of my dreams, I'm going to educate myself and have fun - which doesn't mean sleeping with as many girls as possible.... So vanilla, dangerous and sad...

(in reply to Laura)

Post #: 15

RE: What's the Best Part about being a Switch? - 12/30/2004 5:27:57 PM

Sweeticing

Posts: 158
Joined: 12/30/2004
Status: offline

My dom friend loves it when I tell him about me being femdom to someone he only knows me as a sub . Yes it causes me to be willful and a little unruly but he loves the challange. It does help to be on the other side of the flogger every once in awhile. At least I can say I know how that feels because I have been there done that and had it done to me. Im just naturaly a good domme but everyonce in awhile I want someone else to do all the work.

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quote:

"What one has not experienced, one will never understand in print."...

quote:

"Imagination is more important than knowledge" Albert Einstein..

(in reply to muse)

Post #: 16

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