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Switch, and proud of it! - 2/5/2005 7:38:39 AM

fullokinks

Posts: 12
Joined: 12/29/2004
Status: offline

I live in South Florida and am sort of an irregular regular in the local scene. It's really carefully scripted here, with doms and subs playing clearly defined roles. The net has never interested me before, but I wanted to try reaching out for people with more open minds. Wow! What a disappointment! A switch is just as much a pariah here as anywhere else. It's my burden, though, and I'll bear it with dignity because I know that a switch is a very special person, and I am proud to be one. Stay strong my brothers and sisters!

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RE: Switch, and proud of it! - 2/5/2005 8:38:29 AM

MizSuz

Posts: 1416
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

fullo'

LOVE the bike. LOVE IT.

My experience is that people who find switches to be pariahs have a very small and limited view of the scene. If they do not treat you as you prefer to be treated, consider they've helped you in your filtering process, tick them off your list and quietly thank them for saving you time and trouble.

Imagine how frustrating it would be to find out they are smaller minded then you prefer after having invested a good deal of time, energy and emotion into them.

I'm not really a switch, I'm a sado-masochistic dominant woman, but I too have seen people try to foist their misconceptions on others ("you're not really a switch, you're a confused submissive who can't let yourself commit" "you'd be submissive if you had the right dom/me" "I could never submit to a switch because they're not really dominant" ad nauseum).

I welcome you here and look forward to your contributions. There are a lot of switches on this board, actually.

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Suz

In honor of the impending ski season: If you're not livin' on the edge you're takin' up too much space!

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RE: Switch, and proud of it! - 2/5/2005 8:44:51 AM

westside

Posts: 69
Joined: 1/28/2004
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The best of both worlds, I say.

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RE: Switch, and proud of it! - 2/5/2005 11:09:29 AM

Moleculor

Posts: 182
Joined: 5/23/2004
Status: offline

To be honest, I don't think I've ever truely had someone single me out as being "less than" because I'm a switch. Certainly, there are profiles on ColarMe that I've seen (both top and bottom) that say things along the lines of "If you're a switch, and you email, I'll block you," but I've never really felt like a pariah because of it. (I certainly am VERY different from most of the one-sided kinksters though.)

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RE: Switch, and proud of it! - 2/10/2005 11:15:33 PM

LongRiverWolf

Posts: 6
Status: offline

I have to say tahnks for your reply. You are open-minded and it is nice to hear your words. Another misunderstood Switch who's sick of narrow-minded Pricesses/Princes, etc.

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RE: Switch, and proud of it! - 2/10/2005 11:21:44 PM

LongRiverWolf

Posts: 6
Status: offline

Hey I live an hour and a half from NYNY, and it's just the same, as is Boston. Thankfully there are a few understanding people out there. One of the reasons why I became good at being Dominant is that I had a difficult time finding a Mistress who I was totally enamored with (fusssiness), and once in a while i see some on the Net, but the price and distance still makes me even better at Dominating (laughs). But tis all right as i will have the ultimate again as i once did. With respect and understanding LRW

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RE: Switch, and proud of it! - 2/11/2005 12:04:06 AM

Suleiman

Posts: 543
Joined: 9/9/2004
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You know, I still find that sort of attitude odd. Then again, I find the habit some people have of automatically applying a gender pronoun (usually female) when referring to an unnamed submissive whose gender is unspecificed to also be a bit odd - or at least misguided and myopic.

When I entered the local community, I was encouraged to experiment, to give things a try. I discovered, for instance, that while I adore the penis in general, most guys don't know how to kiss, which can be a real turnoff for me. By the same token, I was encouraged to switch, to give every possible experience a try. Topping scared the hell out of me at first, but while I've been dissatisfied with my performance from time to time, I've never regretted the experience.

Folks who deny the possibility of a switch usually strike me as being a bit insecure. Some people need labels to make the world around them less threatening, and they lack the mental capacity to add new cubby holes as needed. Thus, by attempting to enter a new category into their mental list, you are obviously a subsversive agent of the powers of anarchy and bad spelling, here to mess with their neatly ordered universe.

Okay, usually the explanation isn't nearly as amusing as that, but I try to make up for their lack of imagination.

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SI HOC LEGERE SCIS NIMIUM ERUDITIONIS HABES

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RE: Switch, and proud of it! - 2/11/2005 6:28:49 PM

bluedogg7000

Posts: 16
Joined: 1/2/2005
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Bravo and applause to all of us proud switches out there. I feel that it is a thoughtful and intelligent approach to "our thing" but not for everyone. My experience in this lifestyle is that for the most part, the people who are truly devotees, are accepting of most anything which I find to be one of the great benefits. For the rest, I gave up worrying about what other people think of me long ago...

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RE: Switch, and proud of it! - 2/11/2005 7:12:16 PM

SecretDomme

Posts: 152
Joined: 1/21/2004
Status: offline

When I say I am seeking a submissive only, it is not because I do not respect switches. If you enjoy both sides- go for it :-) I desire a relationship where my sub gets what he needs and I get what I need. Because I do not switch, being with a switch would most likely require him to seek his dominant side outside of our relationship, and that is not something I desire in a partner.

Be well,
Julie

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