Showing consideration by responding to a responce

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All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Showing consideration by responding to a responce

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Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 4/30/2004 9:02:08 AM

ScorpioMaster

Posts: 146
Joined: 3/30/2004
Status: offline

I feel it is time for those who are seeking some one start showing some consideration to those who took their time out to respond to your profile. I know so many say they get too many responce to their repsonce to answer evey one. I would say then why did you even put up a profile. Any search for something worth while is worth the extra work. Jus becuase you are sub/slave does not mean you not get away from work. I have had those who were very polite by saying thank you but I found some one. To those I say thank you for the consideration enough to respond back to me. This lifestyle is not like any thing you are use to so stop putting vanilla guide line in it. You choice this life style for a reason. If you choice it for play only then do not say you are in the lifestyle. You are for play only. This is my feeling and opions.

< Message edited by ScorpioMaster -- 4/30/2004 9:02:59 AM >

Post #: 1

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 4/30/2004 10:52:19 AM

iwillserveu

Posts: 1641
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

First off, Be a man. Chicks are different. Live with it and stop whining.

You have a point. Unfortunately, most of the women here have "not looking" on their profile but still get lots of mail. And yes, apparently the delete function doesn't work right.

(hey, ladies, I complain about the "little piggie send me money" e-mails too.)

_____________________________

When the Lady smiles i can't resist her call. As a matter of fact, i don't resist at all. Well that depends if it is a smile or a grimmace.

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 2

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 4/30/2004 11:16:31 AM

ScorpioMaster

Posts: 146
Joined: 3/30/2004
Status: offline

I am a man a kind that show women respect why can I get the same back.That is all I ask,you get what you give. Second I am excerising my freedom of speech. Thir protacols are important and without it why are you in the lifestyle in the first place. Just because you are hiding behind a icon does not mean I should show you respect on_line.

(in reply to iwillserveu)

Post #: 3

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 4/30/2004 12:54:45 PM

inyouagain

Posts: 427
Joined: 1/6/2004
Status: offline

Greetings ScorpioMaster, and welcome to the message board.

There is a lengthy thread on this topic, titled Emails and Courtesy, in the "ask a submissive" forum.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ScorpioMaster
I feel it is time for those who are seeking some one start showing some consideration to those who took their time out to respond to your profile. I know so many say they get too many responce to their repsonce to answer evey one. I would say then why did you even put up a profile. Any search for something worth while is worth the extra work. Jus becuase you are sub/slave does not mean you not get away from work.

Somehow I feel that had you read other threads here before posting these comments, you likely would not have made them in your first post. Your comments seem to reflect specifically what you want, what you expect, and what you feel sub/slaves that are total strangers to you should be doing with their time... catering to you, and your wishes. I've found that the vanilla world does not work that way, nor does the lifestyle. Those are some pretty bold statements that you feel should apply to absolute strangers. How many more responses like your's do these you speak of receive daily. With every e-mail Master out there telling them what to do, it could get confusing to say the least don't you think.

If a sub/slave does not belong to you, you really have no right to expect anything what so ever from them, and doing so would be a delusion and not reality. In the thread linked above you will find much commentary that probbaly would have tempered your post here, and if nothing else pointed out the duplication in your thread.

Sure we all get disappointed, that's natural. Expecting anything, let alone demanding anything from an absolute stranger is not natural.

quote:

I have had those who were very polite by saying thank you but I found some one. To those I say thank you for the consideration enough to respond back to me.

Courtesy and politeness are not things you can demand. You seem to demand respect as a Dominant, but there's many threads you can read here on that concept. Respect is typically earned from those directly affected by your dominance, not absolute strangers on a personal's site.

Etiquette... certainly, read more threads dealing with that issue also.

quote:

This lifestyle is not like any thing you are use to so stop putting vanilla guide line in it. You choice this life style for a reason. If you choice it for play only then do not say you are in the lifestyle. You are for play only. This is my feeling and opions.

Who are you to tell anyone directly what this lifestyle is about? It's their lifestyle too!

I'd suggest reading a lot more than whining, it's much less embarrassing. You are not alone, but yet you like the others have to take what is given you. Demanding is a form of play, so IAW your own logic, you evidently are playing, and bitching about what you perceive to be players.

Inyouagain

_____________________________

Careful with that axe, Eugene

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 4

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 4/30/2004 1:14:50 PM

ScorpioMaster

Posts: 146
Joined: 3/30/2004
Status: offline

I am talking about something that most us was taught to respect to people period this is not about given it as a D/s. I am not whinning just making a remark about how every one is not showing respect period. It seems worse on_line so we should not talk about it. It is too easy to allow this happen because we are not in person. I work every day and show people respect. I know people in the real world their parents taught this. So your answer is that is the way the world is or should we speak out to raise awareness how we are to each other. I am not going to any thing mroe about. I said what I wanted to say and I hope it get people to think. I do not exspect people to call me sir ot Master because they are sub/slave. If this is not a place to make observation and raise awareness. Please be so kind and tell me were I can. For those responding to my thread than you for your input.

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 5

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 4/30/2004 6:36:37 PM

iwillserveu

Posts: 1641
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

So, do you think I owe you respect or the women ignoring your e-mails?

The world don't owe nobody nothing.(A triple negative, Anyone figure that one out?

) Fortunately or unfortunately women are in this world. So am I.

One possible reason is they posted a profile and have not been here in months. Another possible reason is things changed for them and they never updated their profile. Whatever reason, do you really care? I mean would you like to meet a rude woman?

(Hey, maybe it is a fetish.

)

Oh, rude men are easy to find. Hi

.

_____________________________

When the Lady smiles i can't resist her call. As a matter of fact, i don't resist at all. Well that depends if it is a smile or a grimmace.

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 6

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 4/30/2004 7:58:10 PM

SherriA

Posts: 553
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ScorpioMaster

You choice this life style for a reason. If you choice it for play only then do not say you are in the lifestyle. You are for play only. This is my feeling and opions.

Ya know, posts like this make me soooooooo glad that I'm NOT "in the lifestyle". I much prefer having a life, where I can set my own priorities and not have people suggest that I owe them anything (respect, a response, whatever) simply because they exist.

_____________________________

-- Sherri

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 7

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 5/1/2004 2:10:00 AM

Estring

Posts: 1266
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Scorpio, you have reinforced my opinion about men who use Master in their nickname.
First of all, are you aware of just how much email subs and slaves receive? I can't imagine how they could answer all of them.
Secondly, after reading your posts, I have an idea of why you don't get responses.

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 8

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 5/1/2004 5:39:25 AM

ZenMaster

Posts: 52
Joined: 1/30/2004
Status: offline

You cannot take any of what you wrote personally, especially online stuff. If you do, you will have a very hard time not only mastering someone else but mastering yourself. Do yourself a favor and let it go. It's not worth getting worked up about.

ZM

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 9

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 5/1/2004 10:53:54 AM

proudsub

Posts: 3896
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

In another thread many people said they do not respond to messages with poor spelling and grammar so it might help if you proof read your messages ScorpioMaster. I do not mean to be critical but am just repeating what was said in another thread here.

< Message edited by proudsub -- 5/2/2004 11:13:53 AM >

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 10

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 5/2/2004 2:02:47 AM

GoddessMarissa

Posts: 240
Joined: 4/10/2004
From: Las Vegas NV
Status: offline

Just because your in the S/M lifestyle does not mean you have to repy to anyone. I have written to a person, and he did not answer. That's o.k. I dont want any wasted space saying he's not interested anyway. If they dont answer, that tells you your answer right there. As far as writing a little introduton letter, come on how much time does that take anyway.

_____________________________

D/s makes the world go round~~
www.Domina.ms/love

(in reply to ScorpioMaster)

Post #: 11

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 5/2/2004 4:57:12 AM

deannawill

Posts: 4
Joined: 4/11/2004
Status: offline

I try my best to reply to every message I receive. But I may have missed a few by accident, etc. My personal guideline is to respond in kind. If someone puts time and (obvious) effort into the msg, I feel an inner need to to show an appreciation (even to a stranger) by giving some substance in return. Of course, the content is usually generic. I doubt many would pour their hearts out until he/she gets a better sense of the conversation.

I just recently was sent this message: "What can you offer a Dom who has up till now been streight?" I answered: " I could start by offering a "hello"".

I sent that reply, rather than to ignore or send another rude msg. As a result, we now have begun a dialogue, albiet scant, to this point.

(in reply to GoddessMarissa)

Post #: 12

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 5/2/2004 6:45:53 AM

Sinergy

Posts: 1290
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

Hello,

There are many protocols in the Vanilla world which allow people to interact with each other on a civil and non-combative basis. Shaking hands, for example, is a custom from the middle ages which shows the other person you do not have a knife concealed in it.

There are many discussions in BDSM message boards I have read which deal with protocols in the "community" if there is an actual tight-knit and regulated community.

For me, I find that it shows anybody a great deal of disrespect to slap a label on them and treat them as X. The fact that I meet a person at a munch wearing a red name tag (for submissive) does not mean, to me, that I should immediately be dismissive, order him/her around, and demand that they kowtow to me.

I dont know anything about this person, they dont know anything about me, so assuming something about them and treating them with anything other than politeness and respect is not something I am willing to do.

The same thing applies on message boards, something I have been active on since the 1980s. The general rule I use is "think twice, post once."

And having said that, I keep a stack of green name tags in my car for Munches where it is demanded I label myself as either a red tag or a blue tag. Keep them guessing ;) If somebody really wants to know how I identify myself, all they have to do is ask.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"Why am I surrounded by fricking idiots?" Dr. Evil

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle, 44th Vice President of the United States

(in reply to deannawill)

Post #: 13

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 5/3/2004 9:35:34 PM

DrJohnSea41

Posts: 16
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

This is simply the way things are. Live with it. Someone may get far too many mails to be able to answer, or maybe they might just choose not to repond to any mail that is full of horrible spelling errors, broken sentences and other things that suggest the writer failed to take the time to write something worth reading. Either way, it's distasteful to whine about it.

(in reply to Sinergy)

Post #: 14

RE: Showing consideration by responding to a responce - 5/3/2004 10:30:45 PM

BSOD

Posts: 1
Joined: 1/21/2004
From: Charlotte, NC
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Estring

... Secondly, after reading your posts, I have an idea of why you don't get responses.

As a follow-up on this comment, if the recipients of your messages cannot decipher what you're trying to say, I doubt they will be inclined to send you a reply. A typo here and there is one thing, but a total butchering of the language does not make a positive presentation.

_____________________________

I was so poor growing up, if I wasn't a boy,
I'd have had nothing to play with.

(in reply to Estring)

Post #: 15

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