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Just a general Question - 7/30/2005 3:06:18 PM

aithinneDdT

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Joined: 7/24/2005
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Hello all.. my Master is definately into poly, and i have always known that. Currently it is just us, and i have made it clear that i wont' play with another girl. Master seems ok with this.. for those in poly, do you think this will cause a problem with my eventual sister? Am i being silly about this being my one limit? Questions? Comments? (And yes, the sister is picked out, she just has issues to sort out before she can join us.. eventually He wants three of us)

thanks

aithinne{DdT}
Held in His perfect embrace, warm and safe

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RE: Just a general Question - 7/30/2005 3:15:01 PM

Lordandmaster

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The situation seems OK to me--as long as you are all being honest with yourselves. You don't have to be bi to be poly.

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RE: Just a general Question - 7/30/2005 3:38:30 PM

EmeraldSlave2

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As long as you all know the score, know what to expect and are clear with eachother, a positive relationship can grow between you all.

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RE: Just a general Question - 7/30/2005 6:33:49 PM

MstrHellsFury

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I believe you've set the right coarse of action...by stating up front your desire not to have to involve yourself in a sexual action with your to be sister...when I started my poly family it wasn't until my first saw someone she had interest in...one thing I will say..if force is needed to get you to do something you truely have no intention on doing...something is very wrong and it will never be a happy home...also remember you don't have to have a sexual relationship with all members to be considered a poly family

Fury

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RE: Just a general Question - 7/30/2005 10:58:46 PM

MsPurrmeow

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Joined: 10/30/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrHellsFury
I believe you've set the right coarse of action...by stating up front your desire not to have to involve yourself in a sexual action with your to be sister...when I started my poly family it wasn't until my first saw someone she had interest in...one thing I will say..if force is needed to get you to do something you truely have no intention on doing...something is very wrong and it will never be a happy home...also remember you don't have to have a sexual relationship with all members to be considered a poly family
Fury

This is very well said, Fury. Good advice!

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RE: Just a general Question - 7/31/2005 4:41:23 AM

johnniesub

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Joined: 7/10/2005
From: Nixa, MO
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honesty and openness are the cornerstones of any poly family/group--even more so, i think, than in a vanilla family. so you're on the right road.

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RE: Just a general Question - 8/7/2005 9:12:03 AM

Passion357

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Joined: 8/7/2005
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I absolutely agree with Fury. Very well said!

Master has had numerous in The Family before, and that question comes up often. "Do you have to be bi ...or be with another woman... is it a requirement?" NO It is not In Our Family. Soem may differ. Honestly, We prefer bisexual, but, no, it is not required in the least.

I think you made the right call by stating what you truly feel, and if He (your Dominant) accepted your terms of *not* being with a female sexually, then all is well. Should any problems arise about your non bisexuality, my advice would be simply..."Sir, please refer back to where I stated I am not bi, and do not, by any means, wish to be with another female sexually." ~winks~

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RE: Just a general Question - 8/7/2005 12:48:34 PM

kisshou

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There is a difference between being in a poly family and wanting to participate in 3-some sex. I don't feel it will cause a problem with your new sister but might with your Owner. If that is his desire and you want to please him then I think he would expect you to participate. You might want to explore why that is a limit. Owners have a way of pushing limits until one day you realize what was once a limit is now something you desire. Feelings are not silly but it takes some serious introspection when someone decides on a limit. Another thing to think about is sex aside , will all three off you sleep together.There will be alot of things that will need to be worked out, just be willing to be open , honest and communicate.

kiss

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RE: Just a general Question - 8/9/2005 5:08:03 AM

ShiftedJewel

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quote:

You might want to explore why that is a limit. Owners have a way of pushing limits until one day you realize what was once a limit is now something you desire.

I agree with kisshou. You may want to explore why it is an issue within yourself, it may be something that you can over come, or, who knows, you may find yourself suddenly thinking about trying it. But.. in the same light, if it is something that you feel is a hard limit then stand by that. Any owner worth the title will respect that.

As far as how it will work? Well, I personally don't see any problems with it unless you don't have your feelings of insecurity or jealousy on a tight reign. If it is something that both of you agree on and you keep the lines of communcation open and flowing I don't see that you will have any real difficulties.

Jewel

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RE: Just a general Question - 8/9/2005 6:23:48 AM

ChereeAmoor

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There is nothing wrong with your limits, and I am happy for you that so far, there seems to be no problems with them. Polyamory does NOT mean hot monkey love all day every day, the way some people seem to think it does, and it doesn't mean you should be bisexual.

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RE: Just a general Question - 8/9/2005 4:15:31 PM

DarkVoyeur

Posts: 21
Joined: 12/13/2004
From: Wet Coast Canuckland
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Just a drop to add that I agree with others here. Bisexuality is nice but not a requirement.

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