Finding a younger female sub?

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Finding a younger female sub? - 9/30/2004 8:14:44 AM

uberrmench23

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Joined: 8/29/2004
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I am a 23 year old Dom, and I was wondering why is it so damn hard to find a femail submissive within my age range that is real. Nothing against older submissives, however they tend not to go for younger men. Finding a sub within my age group that is really into this lifestylle is about impossible. 1) They are not geniune about being in this lifestyle for real, 2)They are looking for older men, and 3) They dont exist. What is a younger Dom to do?

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 9/30/2004 8:26:49 AM

sub4hire

Posts: 3834
Joined: 1/1/2004
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If you lived in the states, in California even. I could introduce you to a number of female submissives. What is the lifestyle like where you are? Do they have munches? Any BDSM groups?

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 9/30/2004 9:38:17 AM

NoCalOwner

Posts: 241
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I was talking to my slave about this the other day, as we discussed how it is that she (age 27) is almost always the youngest one at our local munches. The average age at most of them could even be higher than mine (47).

My slave conjectured that most people may require some time to figure out what exactly they want, and I tend to agree. Based on my observations of kink demographics, I also suspect that cute subs in the 18-25 age range (who are not living in a small town in Utah, or otherwise circumstantially challenged) end up spending very little time looking.

While looking at places like this is the obvious first resort, and likely to work out with some patience, I would not rule out the possibility of finding a vanilla girl that you're compatible with, who has no major sexual hangups and thinks that a little kink sounds exciting. You're probably going to have some work ahead of you with most folks in that age group anyway, and somebody has to break in those young girls. Yeah, I know, sounds like a grim chore, huh? Allow me to twist your arm a little...

Damn, now I have the song A Question of Time stuck in my head...

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 9/30/2004 10:11:17 AM

sub4hire

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

I was talking to my slave about this the other day, as we discussed how it is that she (age 27) is almost always the youngest one at our local munches. The average age at most of them could even be higher than mine (47).

I think this depends on the munch. My group is open to all. As long as they are of legal age. Certainly some months the average age may be 35. Then again other munches the average may be 20. We do seem to attract a younger crowd. Then again we also attract the older ones as well. In Southern California we even have munch groups specifically geared at 18-25 year olds.

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 9/30/2004 11:07:31 AM

NoCalOwner

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Quite true, we live in an area where there are exactly 3 munches within an hour drive, and while the tendency towards an older crowd applies to all of those, it is certainly not true in places like the greater LA area. I have no idea what the munches are like in Venice (Italy), so what I said could be totally off the mark.

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 9/30/2004 7:50:06 PM

cheeba0228

Posts: 227
Joined: 7/27/2004
From: Detroit
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Crazy Califonians get all the luck. Here in the D thats Detroit, all the local muches might as well say half way to your AARP card required. All of the people are in their early or mid 40's or older, so finding younger subs is a contest. To make matters worse the only ones I have found that are in their 20's (anywhere in their 20's) are the die hard goth types. You know the kind that dress all in black with black nail polish and black lipstick, jet black dyed hair, and their favorite phrase is "life is Pain" and "Death is the ultimate release" what ever happened to the girl who was a lady on the street but a freaky girl when the curtains are closed??? Many of the women here are the I'm with my man and we are looking for another girl to join us.......you know that story. Oh well until then I keep the faith and will just play like a kid in school.

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 10/28/2004 8:36:25 AM

doggydog

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A large number of female "subs" or "slaves" are actually neither; but are women facing the inevitable lessening of relationship opportunities as they age. As such, they are more willing to accomodate in order to find someone.

Younger and more attractive women have more opportunities for relationships, and are therefore less willing to "give" in order to "get."

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 10/28/2004 2:41:20 PM

blushes4u

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And here i thought i was young !!! I may have had tendencies when i was in the 20's but never came out til now so go figure.

*blushes*

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 10/28/2004 3:10:43 PM

EStrict

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What you call settling sounds more like a lack of confidence to me. I know many strong woman, submissive, slave and dominant a like in their 40's and 50's that won't *settle*,,, they will look for what they need in their lives.

I *settled* at 19 because I was to young to understand a *need* to be in a relationship. I did not settle or give in at the age of 37, because I did not have to. I learned that at the act age of 34 when my husband of 15 years told me that I could never interest another man, so I was stuck with him. Now, *that* was something I was unwilling to accept, and during my dating days after my marriage I dated guys within 15 years of my age (younger and higher) and never had a problem finding someone who *wanted* me for me, not for my age.

Should my relationship end tomorrow for some unforseen reason, I would be devasted... but if *I* decided to go into another relationship, I still wouldn't *settle*.

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 10/28/2004 3:20:09 PM

mouseyone

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Joined: 10/21/2004
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I agree only on one thing from this thread...If someone wants me , its for me and not my age...Cheers Estrict!! :)

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 10/28/2004 3:42:36 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2245
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
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I think this has to depend a lot on where you're at. I'm 22 and have a medium-ish group of "lifestyle" friends.

Though, none of us are active in our local communitites. Something I've noticed is that many young people of all roles have experienced some pretty harsh nastyness when they attempt to go to reallife events. The people I talk to have kind of come to the conclution that older people feel rather threatened by younger people attempting to 'break in' to their place.

~shrug~ probably not true, just how we've perceived things.

Also, I find that a lot of young, novice submissive people prefer to be with someone who has some experience. I don't quite agree with this view as I prefer to be with someone who grows with me, but I can very much understand wanting to be with someone who knows his/her way around, so to speak. Regardless of how early one got invovled, I personally don't think that a 23y/o -can- have a large range of experience, based simply on time that person's been alive.

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 10/28/2004 4:07:03 PM

Mercnbeth

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Joined: 6/18/2004
From: Palos Verdes Estates
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quote:

I am a 23 year old Dom, and I was wondering why is it so damn hard to find a femail submissive within my age range that is real.

first off, finding real people of any age can be time consuming and difficult.

quote:

Nothing against older submissives, however they tend not to go for younger men.

it probably took some time for self discovery for most of the real ones, as they found out that it was not just a passing fancy, or some new and interesting way to "get their freak on" as they spent their 20's and maybe even their 30's wrestling their minds away from their family's dysfunctions they suffered through, through and hopefully out of the abusive relationships they involved themselves with when they mistook an abusive jerk for a respectable Dom, as well as society's hypnotic conditioning and unrelenting insistance on how we are supposed to behave as our gender and (gasp) common decency

determines. this slave did not go for younger men even in her previous vanilla life, never have found the ones this slave's age or younger to be attractive...and didn't come into the knowledge that this lifestyle even existed until she was 36.

What is a younger Dom to do?
ask some older, experienced Doms, they are a wealth of information and they can be very helpful!
good luck in Your search!

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RE: Finding a younger female sub? - 10/28/2004 5:48:42 PM

BeachMystress

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Joined: 4/3/2004
From: South Bay (LA area), CA - Southern California
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Look for a GenX munch in your area. Oh.. you're in Italy. I was going to suggest you contact people in my local GenX munch (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/GenX_Munch/) since they were likely to know of others. But I doubt they know of them in other countries. I do have two Italian links. Perhaps someone locally could help hook you in. http://www.ilcastello.org/ and http://www.manettematte.org/ If you ever get to Rome, you might want to check out Ritual http://www.ritualtheclub.com/ Good Hunting.

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