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Definitions? - 12/28/2005 3:26:26 PM

Notanaddict

Posts: 59
Joined: 12/18/2005
From: Sydney
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Ok so I'm just a bit confused... is switching when u can switch on ALL aspects of bdsm lifestyles, or would u say that a switch is more someone who, for example, would have a dominating demeneour outside of the bedroom, but like to bottom in it?

I'm just wondering, I'm not a big fan of labels either way, but I can be quit dominating, both profetionally and privatly, but enjoy to both top and bottom in the bedroom... so am i a switch or just a bottom because its what happens during "play" that is mostly importnat for the label?

thank u for any responses

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RE: Definitions? - 12/28/2005 5:46:14 PM

fergus

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Joined: 6/22/2005
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I think (no expert here) that a switch is someone who switches Top and bottom roles depending on either the situation, scene, or person they are with.

Some folk switch with each other, some others are strictly Top with one person while bottom to another.

One thing is for sure ... no hard and fast rules.

fergus

(in reply to Notanaddict)

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RE: Definitions? - 12/28/2005 9:49:19 PM

LaMalinche

Posts: 361
Joined: 10/20/2005
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Switch: to move or sway back and forth - much like a cat's tail.

or

to shift or exchange.

There is no hard and fast rule, just like everything else in life. Just go with it, Baby, and have a great time.

LaMalinche

--"Of course, just because we've heard a spine-chilling, blood-curdling scream of the sort to make your very marrow freeze in your bones doesn't automatically mean there's anything wrong."

(Terry Pratchett, Soul Music)

(in reply to fergus)

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RE: Definitions? - 1/16/2006 5:48:48 PM

Krasnaya

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Joined: 9/22/2005
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Well personally "switch" doesn't have much to do with my daily life. While maybe in bed, depending on the person, someone could tell me what to do...that rarely happens in other parts of my life. That's just me though. Giving up power or taking over in the bedroom on the other hand...yummy.

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RE: Definitions? - 1/16/2006 7:31:55 PM

shiminess

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Joined: 1/11/2006
From: Georgia
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i call myself a switch because i don't fit into either category easily. oh, i used to be very submissive inside and outside of the bedroom. but i was never shown any other way of being, it was either do it their way or no way at all. but i grew out of that, learned i liked being the mistress and the slave and now i fully declare that i can and will be both and refuse to be either one all the time.

(in reply to Krasnaya)

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RE: Definitions? - 1/16/2006 8:52:52 PM

Evanesce

Posts: 633
Joined: 9/14/2005
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Labels... ugh! I truly hate them, and only call myself a "switch" because most people cannot grasp the concept of a dominant, sadistic slave who needs to be controlled, yet craves the power rush only the infliction of pain can provide.

You are what you are, and the only label that's going to feel right to you is the one you give yourself.

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RE: Definitions? - 1/18/2006 1:52:43 PM

Nuke718

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I have to go with fergus's answer. For myself, I am comfortable in either the top or bottom role in BDSM play (and to a lessor extent either Ds position).

BUT as stated on this very thread those labels/definitions/descriptions do not work for everybody.

Usually it only applys to your BDSM orientation. So your bedroom sub example notanaddict is not how folks generally use the term. Feel free to use whats comfy for yourself tho.

Nuke }:-

(in reply to Evanesce)

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RE: Definitions? - 1/18/2006 3:56:11 PM

BitaTruble

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quote:

Labels... ugh! I truly hate them, and only call myself a "switch" because most people cannot grasp the concept of a dominant, sadistic slave who needs to be controlled, yet craves the power rush only the infliction of pain can provide.

Almost the exact same reason that I call myself a switch. If I had to slap a label on my ass, it would be 14 feet long.

Celeste

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RE: Definitions? - 1/18/2006 7:22:44 PM

fergus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

Almost the exact same reason that I call myself a switch. If I had to slap a label on my ass, it would be 14 feet long.

Celeste

There's something to be said for having one's ass switched also ;)

fergus

(in reply to BitaTruble)

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RE: Definitions? - 3/3/2006 1:08:35 PM

Level

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Everyone, it seems, has their own definitions of all the labels tossed around the BDSM world. Mine are as follows:

Top= one who plays the dominant role in doing a scene, almost always for sexual gratification.

bottom= one who plays the submissive role in a scene, almost always for sexual gratification.

Dominant= one that enjoys exerting control in sexual AND non-sexual ways. Gives a greater degree of leeway to their partner than a Master would.

submissive= one that enjoys relinquishing control in sexual AND non-sexual ways. Generally has a larger area of limits than a slave would.

Master= one that generally enjoys exerting their control into every aspect of their partner's life, seeking as few limits and as much ownership as possible.

slave= one that generally enjoys giving up control in every aspect of their life to their Owner, working towards eliminating limits to their being owned.

S/switch= one of the cursed ones of kinkville LOL. "Not genuine lifestylers; a game-playing, impure, confused, fence-straddling sort", some say. And those are the nicer ones. However, more intelligent folks define switches as ones that enjoy some aspects of controlling/being controlled. I, dear reader, am a Switch.

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RE: Definitions? - 3/3/2006 7:25:23 PM

Slipstreme

Posts: 261
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Me I refuse to define myself. However, more and more I am finding myself Dominant, but also a sadomasochist, hence considering myself a Switch. However, who knows what the future has in store. I will also throw another wrench in there, by Domming, sexually or non-sexually dressed in the garb of a submissive or bottom. Cuffs and collars, love them. Submit in them, nah, unless I'm being a little bottomy.

Simply a Switch: someone who is neither dominant, or submissive, may be both, may also have interest in sadism/masochism, maybe both, and in general people who don't fit into the normal expected BDSM relationship, who can or may decide not to pursue a TPE relationship.

Although I believe I am the only one who has the complaint of feeling both sadistic and masochistic at the same time, an increasingly frequent phenomenon, leading to many internal conflicts and occasional headaches.

< Message edited by Slipstreme -- 3/3/2006 7:27:21 PM >

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RE: Definitions? - 3/4/2006 7:36:11 PM

Lashra

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fergus

I think (no expert here) that a switch is someone who switches Top and bottom roles depending on either the situation, scene, or person they are with.

Some folk switch with each other, some others are strictly Top with one person while bottom to another.

One thing is for sure ... no hard and fast rules.

fergus