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All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Polyamorous Lifestyles >> Could you be anymore vague?

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Could you be anymore vague? - 12/23/2005 1:37:59 PM

LadyElizabeth

Posts: 53
Joined: 11/28/2004
Status: offline

I thought when I filled out my profile, explaining what I was looking for, I would be detailed and exact about it. After surfing through the masses of profiles. I have found that this is not the norm. If fact most are so vague that one couldn't come to a conclusion about whether or not to e mail the person if you tried.

After e mailing so many people that checked off the boxes with simular interests or "looking for" boxes that fit mutual aspects. I have recieved no replies.

Hey, even if I'm not what you're looking for, a polite no thanks or something would be nice. Or if you were looking and found your match. Then edit your profile and people like me will stop bugging you.

Oh what's a girl to do???lol

< Message edited by LadyElizabeth -- 12/23/2005 1:38:26 PM >

_____________________________

Judge not lest ye be judged.

I do have a profile, for some reason you have to actually search my name from cm's main page. I have no idea why, that's just the way it is. lol.

Post #: 1

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/23/2005 2:04:21 PM

michaelGA

Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline

i know what You mean, Ma'am. i have tried matching up with like-minded people and the majority of them will not reply. in fact some even go as far as blocking.

makes me wonder why they are even here. especially the local ones to me. like they are on here to look at profiles and afraid to connect with someone they could actually have some form of actual control over. then there's the "Pro" Dommes that won't talk to you unless there's money involved.

(in reply to LadyElizabeth)

Post #: 2

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/23/2005 2:48:29 PM

pawschan

Posts: 19
Joined: 11/26/2005
Status: offline

I always try to reply with a " No Thanks" or something along those lines, but then, you have to remember, a lot of people get a lot of replies to their profiles, and a lot of people get those generic mailings. Some people are just rude. o.o But then again, I'm really only on here looking for help, advice, and friends, not relationships. I hope you find some people who suit you.

(in reply to LadyElizabeth)

Post #: 3

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/23/2005 2:56:40 PM

michaelGA

Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline

quote:

I hope you find some people who suit you.

this is much easier said than done. the only choices in my area are mostly out of town, why is it that local people seem to either want someone long distance or nobody at all. it would be a good idea if i lived in a larger city where i have more choices. seeing the same profile being active day after day and not being able to connect with them.

"last man on Earth" seems to apply here

(in reply to pawschan)

Post #: 4

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/23/2005 4:26:14 PM

JohnWarren

Posts: 1931
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

quote:

I hope you find some people who suit you.

this is much easier said than done. the only choices in my area are mostly out of town, why is it that local people seem to either want someone long distance or nobody at all. it would be a good idea if i lived in a larger city where i have more choices. seeing the same profile being active day after day and not being able to connect with them.

"last man on Earth" seems to apply here

You really should consider how you present yourself and what you have to offer. The local people couldn't be blamed for feeling they were making a rational choice... particularly if they also read the Collarme board.

It's not enough to be; one must offer something

_____________________________

----
www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to michaelGA)

Post #: 5

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/23/2005 5:55:38 PM

AuroraSilk

Posts: 14
Joined: 6/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

quote:

I hope you find some people who suit you.

this is much easier said than done. the only choices in my area are mostly out of town, why is it that local people seem to either want someone long distance or nobody at all. it would be a good idea if i lived in a larger city where i have more choices. seeing the same profile being active day after day and not being able to connect with them.

"last man on Earth" seems to apply here

You really should consider how you present yourself and what you have to offer. The local people couldn't be blamed for feeling they were making a rational choice... particularly if they also read the Collarme board.

It's not enough to be; one must offer something

That is 100% correct! Thank you for making that point.

(in reply to JohnWarren)

Post #: 6

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/23/2005 9:35:37 PM

pawschan

Posts: 19
Joined: 11/26/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

quote:

I hope you find some people who suit you.

this is much easier said than done. the only choices in my area are mostly out of town, why is it that local people seem to either want someone long distance or nobody at all. it would be a good idea if i lived in a larger city where i have more choices. seeing the same profile being active day after day and not being able to connect with them.

"last man on Earth" seems to apply here

Well, I'll tell you, I grew up near NYC and I never found anyone who had anything near close to my interests, except online. All my relationships, with the exception of one... Moved out to the West Coast, and bam! Here I am with two boyfriends, though only one of them lives out here. I think it's all a matter of time and patience. Oh well. I think the internet is a great tool, though. I wouldn't have met either of my current lovers without it.

But JohnWarren made a valid point. If you don't offer up anything, how can you expect anything back? It's all about balance.

(in reply to michaelGA)

Post #: 7

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/24/2005 2:55:19 AM

LadyElizabeth

Posts: 53
Joined: 11/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pawschan
But JohnWarren made a valid point. If you don't offer up anything, how can you expect anything back? It's all about balance.

Offer up what? What more can one offer electronically, but ones honesty and sincerity.

I tried the long winded sales pitch, no replies.

I tried the trollers fav, "lets chat", that didn't do any better.

I'm beginning to develope a complex. Have I set my bar so high as to be un-attainable. I actually asked that question in a different thread. No need to answer that.

I realize it's going to take time. I'm not looking for instant gratification. Just some common curtiousy would be a pleasent change.

_____________________________

Judge not lest ye be judged.

I do have a profile, for some reason you have to actually search my name from cm's main page. I have no idea why, that's just the way it is. lol.

(in reply to pawschan)

Post #: 8

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/24/2005 8:11:50 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 2651
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyElizabeth
Hey, even if I'm not what you're looking for, a polite no thanks or something would be nice. Or if you were looking and found your match. Then edit your profile and people like me will stop bugging you.

Oh what's a girl to do???lol

Don't expect anyone online to share your values and priorities.

Be happily surprised when someone does.

(in reply to LadyElizabeth)

Post #: 9

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/24/2005 8:17:41 AM

michaelGA

Posts: 905
Joined: 12/12/2005
Status: offline

*mock ad*

if You're a Dom/me, still breathing and can read this...You'll do

*just kidding*

that's as vague as i can think of short of not saying anything.

(are we having fun, yet?)

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 10

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/24/2005 8:16:30 PM

MstrHellsFury

Posts: 388
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

if I say I can offer three hots and a cot...does that sound like you'll be staying in a cage...is watersport...washing the car....we see what we want to see...hear what we want to hear...and not everything we say reaches another as we say it.......rely on time to steer your rudder....enjoy the view...and wish for the stars...( me...I wish for the entire universe)...just a habit...something about possessing things of great value....like...heck why am I telling you what's of valur to me...go enjoy yourself and find your own valueable possessions...<g>

Fury

(in reply to LadyElizabeth)

Post #: 11

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/24/2005 11:28:40 PM

addcted2it

Posts: 78
Joined: 10/28/2004
From: Sonoma County, California, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyElizabeth

After e mailing so many people that checked off the boxes with simular interests or "looking for" boxes that fit mutual aspects. I have recieved no replies.

Hey, even if I'm not what you're looking for, a polite no thanks or something would be nice. Or if you were looking and found your match. Then edit your profile and people like me will stop bugging you.

Oh what's a girl to do???lol

Hey, LadyElizabeth, we get that all the time! Welcome to the club. It's practically a right of passage here and on other similar sites. What can one expect from the "me" generation?

- addcted2it

_____________________________

Submission is not an excuse to abuse.
Life is short! Live it to the fullest!

(in reply to LadyElizabeth)

Post #: 12

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/25/2005 9:44:16 AM

wolffeathers

Posts: 185
Joined: 8/6/2005
Status: offline

some of us are more here for the forum.

However, that doesn't mean a quick note wouldn't be nice.

Then again, the only emails I get are from my pet, and someone asking about my last journal entry.

_____________________________

It's my way or the highway. Just happens that the highway is on my way.

~Master Wolf

(in reply to addcted2it)

Post #: 13

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/25/2005 10:41:11 AM

fastlane

Posts: 1386
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline

Patience my Dear....Patience.

You can wade through a sewage of crap here, but eventually find the diamond ring you dropped down the toilet.
Good things come to those who wait.
So much bad, from those who jump into things too fast.
Fastlane, steers towards the slowlane, hoping to lead by example

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to wolffeathers)

Post #: 14

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/26/2005 3:43:42 PM

LadyElizabeth

Posts: 53
Joined: 11/28/2004
Status: offline

Ok, I'm giggling now. Some of you are funny.

Is it really that bad out here. I'm relatively new to the on line thing, but are manners and honesty supposed to be a trait we teach our kids. So when they grow up, they behave better then this?

_____________________________

Judge not lest ye be judged.

I do have a profile, for some reason you have to actually search my name from cm's main page. I have no idea why, that's just the way it is. lol.

(in reply to fastlane)

Post #: 15

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/26/2005 3:55:51 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 2651
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyElizabeth
Is it really that bad out here. I'm relatively new to the on line thing, but are manners and honesty supposed to be a trait we teach our kids. So when they grow up, they behave better then this?

People in bdsm are just like everyone else. Same issues you've had all your life are the same ones you will have now.

(in reply to LadyElizabeth)

Post #: 16

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 12/28/2005 4:33:53 AM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2326
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Elizabeth patience is a virtue. judge not lest ye be judged.
I went to Your profile and found none.Seems the girl* did*
what she wanted to *do* remove the chance for any to seek
her out.
==============

michaelGA everyone has their own tastes and what might match
for you on a profile when you respond and are blocked means
your end is not a match for the other. dont take rejection
on the world wide web so personal, if you do then be prepared
to die a million, no billion times while on here. This site
is not a real life munch, dungeon, private group nor place
where all follow any main lifestyle proticals so its baseless
to expect any to follow such here as most will rag you when
you ask for such simplistics, I know Im ragged all the time.
Its a meat market, get use to being treated as such by many
and learn to have fun with it like I do.
===============

pawschan you said it best, many here are not looking for a
relationship at all but trying to learn just what alternate
lifestyles are all about or who are us kinkie, deviant,wicked,
weird, freaks in the world.
===============

Oh Johnnnn of course its enough to just BE. None have to offer
anything to be accepted or to be treated with respect. Only Sadists
like Me offer things in order to gain just reaction. ~evil grin~
===============

Oh AuroraSilk I think John is only %47&5/8th correct.~smiles~
===============

Congrats on Your searching and finding pawschan. I wonder tho was it
you who found your relationships or your relationships that found you?
Did all three find each other at the sametime equally? Or was there
just one who did the major seeking out to the positive end?
===============

Elizabeth two posts and I still have found no way to contact You nor
read a profile of You. If I were what You were looking for and say
shy You would never know for I could not post in a public forum but
might send a email. You have ruled and limited Yourself out of Your
Own game so stop whinning, its unattractive and make a change.
===============

Your the real one who is %99&7/8th right! LuckyAlbatross
===============

You just became a sample michaelGA of what I had addressed to Elizabeth
in post 2.
===============

Stops short and looks at the Hansum Hells Fury, reads His words, snickers
at His humor and wisDom and moves on holding onto the eyecandy I seen.
===============

Why addcted2it you can expect the: X generation here,Aquarian generation
here,Mastered generation here ( baby boomers) to just name a few....
the me generation just happens by the way to be the smallest populous on
the planet to date.I think the me's have a hard way commin down the road........
===============

And You dont seem the least bit concerned about not having mail from the
masses do You Wolf? ~smiles~
===============

OM MY JAH I know that fastlane dident say he was wallowing
thru sewage for a diamond he dropped? Gawd YOU ARE KINKIE! You lil turd
You! Jokin~~~~~ With examples like Us fastlane just who could go wrong?
==============

Elizabeth This is NOT YOUR MOTHERS VANILLA, SOCIETYS RIGHT,SITE FOR NORMAL
MANNERED FOLKS. We are kinksters, Tops, cross dressers, Sadists, Gothettes,
slaves, masocists, poni's, ProDommes, cumsluts, Masters, diaperwearers
humiliationists, who all have various proticals and manners We use
when within Our Lifestyle Personna's here online and in Our Lifes.
Some have manners and others do not but all should be at the
least tolerated and shown tolerance to if not respect if We are to
also gain tolerance for Our Own kinks and what Normal Society deems as
whacko.... LOL Just gain a lil patience and jump back on the band wagon,
Your missen a really good tune here........
==============

Happy Kwanzzaa Everybody And may the New Year be filled with Your every
fear!

HAHAHAHAHA Yea Yea Yea You know Me, I just had to be different.

_____________________________

♥I only need 4 kinds of Animals in My life♥
♥A Jaguar in My garage♥ ♥A Mink on My back♥
♥A few Lions in My bed♥ ♥A Jackass to pay for it all♥

♥~smiles evily~♥

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 17

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 1/9/2006 10:14:29 AM

MsDarkShadows

Posts: 1
Joined: 1/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

who are us kinkie, deviant,wicked,
weird, freaks in the world.

who are us kinkie, deviant,wicked,
weird, freaks in the world.

*chucklez*
Ummm, Is that a bad thing?

---
^5's Fury

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

Post #: 18

RE: Could you be anymore vague? - 1/10/2006 5:51:16 AM

MsSonnetMarwood

Posts: 506
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Talbot County, Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

I thought when I filled out my profile, explaining what I was looking for, I would be detailed and exact about it. After surfing through the masses of profiles. I have found that this is not the norm. If fact most are so vague that one couldn't come to a conclusion about whether or not to e mail the person if you tried.

I've had a profile on and off CM for a while now. What I find is that I less I have on my profile, the more responses I get. Now mind you, that doesn't mean I got quality responses - I just got a lot more of them.

I found that having more info is definately the way to go. I have tried to par it down to what I consider essential - a bit about what I'm up to in my life, a few basic requirements about what I consider acceptable in a potential. Even so, there's quite a bit there. I get far fewer email, and even some of quality here and there. Granted, I am looking for something fairly specific with little wiggle room - but also, being in a relationship isn't a priority to me right now.

What I do find is that I am more apt to meet people locally who may not have emailed me on here, but have seen my ad and will come talk to me.

I don't think there's an easy answer to finding "the one" or even "the one for right now".

< Message edited by MsSonnetMarwood -- 1/10/2006 5:52:58 AM >

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

"You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist."
Friedrich Nietzsche

(in reply to LadyElizabeth)

Post #: 19

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